AEON MISFITS
by Spaceman
Summary: My own branch of RedWitch's Misfitverse Crossover Universe. The ranks of the Misfits fill with new recruits and new chaos. Will be a multiple crossovers in the future. Complete with Sequel. HALLOW MISFITS!
1. Chapter 1

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**AEON MISFITS**

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A X-Men Evo Misfits crossover by Spaceman

newfiespaceman yahoo.ca

www dot fanfiction dot net slash spaceman

Last Revision (2nd revision)

**November 27, 2007**

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**DISCLAIMER**

X-Men Evolution is the property of Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, Marvel, and Co.

GI Joe is the property of Hasbro, Marvel, and other companies.

Misfits is the property of Red Witch. Permission Given.

Original chars belong to me.

This is a work of fan fiction for non-profit entertainment purposes only.

No profit or offense intended.

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Resources

Definitions and Quotes from Wikipedia, the BEST Source for Research!

Wikipedia

Marveldatabase 

Wikia TV Tropes (a wonderful writing aid) 

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LOUD SOUND 

telepathy mental command

#phone# Computer Screen

(1) Warning 1st chapter is wordy, a lot of intros. For those who haven't read Red Witch

(2) Most OC names come from "most popular names" and "most common surnames" lists.

(3) Foreign languages come from Internet Translator.

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**Mutant**

The Original meaning. A mutant (also known to early geneticists as a "monster") is an individual, organism, or new genetic character arising or resulting from an instance of mutation, which is a sudden structural change within the DNA of a gene or chromosome of an organism resulting in the creation of a new character or trait not found in the parental type.

When a mutation is weak it dies out, when a mutant is superior to it's parents it breeds and replaces it's parents. It's Darwin's survival of fittest. Mutation is the key to evolution. It has enabled life to evolve from a single-celled organism into the dominant species of the planet.

Current meaning: A mutant is a human being who is born with genetic modifications that allow for abilities not possessed by regular humans. Most typically, mutant powers manifest during puberty and, for some mutants, several years of self-discipline are needed before they can control their powers, while others never gain full control of them. Mutants are supposedly the next stage in human evolution and are often called "homo superior" (Homo sapiens superior) as opposed to "homo sapiens" (Homo sapiens sapiens).

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In the depths a dark lab, a young boy waits in terror. He is surrounded by walls of cold metal and medical equipment. On one wall are two refrigerated vaults. One case is a blood bank, filled with packets of blood, plasma, and saline solution. The other case is filled with blood and tissue samples. The test tubes contain liquids range from straw yellow to dark red to purple to glowing unnatural green.

The vault also contains a source of terror for the boy. Clear containers of bones, organs, severed body parts, and even fetuses of large creatures. A collection of the grotesque.

The young boy is Caucasian with dark skin and short silver-blond hair. The frightened child's most unique distinguishing feature is his eyes. He has silvery eyes that shine in the darkness and the sclera (whites) are pitch black. They are the eyes of a feral mutant which is also proven by animal-like canine teeth, sharp nails, and tapered ears.

His small thin form is clad in a hospital gown and has strange bar codes tattooed on his right cheek. The boy is secured to the table by metallic gray binds on his wrists, ankles, biceps, shoulders, upper legs, waist, and neck. The boy can't move an inch and can only watch as someone approaches. Thin IV lines goes from some of the restraints on his arms to a cylindrical machine under the table.

In the dim light, the boy can see the outline of a tall man with a high collar with glinting glasses.

Minutes later, the air is filled with a horrible noise. A sound filled with pain and suffering. It's like the cry of an animal except it sounds almost human.

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**EPISODE 01:Muddy Future**

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_There is nothing sadder in this world than the waste of human potential. The purpose of evolution is to raise us out of the mud, not have us grovelling in it. _

_Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Cicely, 1992 _

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**Part A**

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**THE PIT, Florida, USA10:43 am**

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It's another day at the Pit, home of anti-terrorism special weapon force G.I. Joe. Another day of training and stopping the forces of evil.

**BOOM!**

Another day for the Misfits to drive them insane. The Misfits is the name given to a unique group of mutant heroes run and cared for by GI Joe.

The majority of the Misfits started as the Brotherhood, a group of trouble-makers from Bayville and under the command of the shape shifter Mystique and mutant terrorist leader Magneto.

The turning point was after a failed mission, Magneto and Mystique took there angry out on Todd Tolensky, a young amphibious mutant known as Toad. They gave him a severe beating and tossed him from there plane to die in a swamp. Todd was rescued by the Joe Roadblock and nursed back to health at there base. The Joes had long promised to protect mutants, especially after the horrific events of In time, Todd gained Roadblock as a guardian, as a father he never had.

"Sorry Beachhead!"

On the base, Todd also met the Delgatos, the craziest sailor in the world Hector X. Delgado known as the Joe "Shipwreck" and his all mutant children. Althea Delgato, a water-manipulator who would be given the codename Wavedancer and became Todd's girlfriend. The genius psychotic triplets Daria, Quinn, and Brittany who would become the psychic powerhouse team Trinity. Finally, the seal-like baby brother Claudius, Lil' C, and the insane alcoholic parrot Polly.

The next friend Todd gained was a mutant engineered by the terrorist organization Cobra. During a jungle trip, Todd discovered the escaped asexual genetically engineered assassin who possesses the powers of camouflage (invisibility) and the ability to read DNA patterns with a touch. Todd named her/him Xi after the Roman project number "11".

Magneto continued his horrid treatment of the Brotherhood, revealing a long history of human experimentation. When Magneto tried to both enhance and enslave Lance Alvers, codename Avalanche, the young earth-manipulator rebelled. He was left for dead and like Todd was rescued by the Joes.

"Move it!"

After a climatic battle, Magneto was defeated and the Joes gained the last of the Brotherhood members. The gothic probability altering Wanda Maximoff codename Scarlet Witch, egotistical speedster Pietro Maximoff, codename Quicksilver, and unmovable mountain of strength Fred Dukes, codename Blob. It took some time, but the Joes became the family the Misfits needed.

After many months, they have had insane adventure after adventure, but unlike there time as Brotherhood members, they have been winning most of the time. They have gained new members.

Beak, a bird-like mutant baby who was rescued by Shipwreck and made a brother to Lil' C.

Arcade (Webber Torque) isn't a mutant, but his genius became the Misfits after messing up the X-Men. He may not have powers, but he more than enough to drive a Cobra snake insane.

Spyder, a gray-skinned mutant girl with the powers to climb on walls and fire strands of electrified

silk. The young Spiderman fan found a home with Joes and Misfits.

Foresight (Larry Trask), a former precog, who was used as a weapon by his own father, Trask. After rebelling to stop the Sentinels, then left as a paralyzed telepath. A recent kidnapping by aliens and a long space adventure resulted in cybernetic enhancements enabling him to move around.

Firestar (Angelica Jones), a fiery mutant girl with the powers of flame and flight. This girl went from being a girl called a jinx in high school to being a real fire starter. She's become a good friend, despite the embarrassment of meeting most of the team in the nude.

Dragonfly (Lina Chakram), an insectile mutant with crystalline wings stronger than steel and healing silk. She was disowned by her parents, but adopted by the Joes. She studies to become a medic, which her healing silk proves useful for.

Pyro (St. John Allerdyce), a former Acolyte and pyromaniac with the ability to manipulate flames. He was abandoned by Magneto after he caused too much damage, but the Misfits now use his fire obsession to there own ends (not necessary the side of good).

The team has recently gained an abandoned baby, an amphibian-based mutant called "Tadpole" who has become a baby brother to Toad. From the moment the infant slimed Cyclops

Sharon Smith, a pink-haired feline therianthrope Catseye has also joined the Misfits after her team the Hellions was slaughtered by Trevor Fitzroy and her adopted mother Emma Frost's arrest. She's become close to X-Men wolf therianthrope Wolfsbane.

Lucid and Torpid, two members of the Morlocks, have also taken residence after Sinister's Marauders slaughters in underground mutant populace in what is known as the Morlock Massacre.

Currently, Todd, Althea, Lance, Wanda, Fred, John and Webber are running laps around the base with Joes Roadblock, Lowlight, Cover Girl, and Shipwreck. Dragonfly is working on her medical skills with medic Lifeline, Bree, and Doc. Catseye is with them getting a full medical Scan. Firestar is working with Airtight for some reason.

The triplets, the babies, and Polly are being babysit by several blackmailed Joes. A situation known as "The Punishment That's Worse Than The Slaughterhouse." Lucid, Torpid, and Spyder decided to pity the poor fools and help, knowing they'll owe them BIG TIME.

"Why do I have to wear extra leg weights?" says Quicksilver.

"Because you can run faster." says Wanda, "Toad wears more so stop complaining!"

"I haven't seen Kitty around." says Toad, not that he minds, "I thought the new Cross Training program was suppose to bring us together with the X-Geeks."

"She's still embarrassed about the coffee cakes." says Lance, "When is that airhead going to learn?"

"Klaxons should have sounded the second that girl enters a kitchen" says Wanda

The new Cross Training Program was designed by Psych-Out. He said the reason the first and second attempts had been a disasters was too many people such as entire teams, conflicting persona such as Scott and Toad, and personal histories such as comparing Duke and Scarlet to Scott and Jean His plans involve pairing an X-Men or New Mutant with a Joe with similar interests or who could provide wanted skills. (see Training Daze for a repeat).

Currently, Betsy and Kitty are training with the Joe ninjas Jynx and Snake-Eyes, and Forge, a former X-Man, is with the Joes own inventor Airtight. Some of the Joes have a sense of dread and some of the X-Men don't blame them. Especially since Boom-Boom has been talking to the demolition experts.

"Seaweed coffee cakes." says Lowlight with a frown, "The X-Men remember BA's cooking from 'Career Day' and we known about Kitty's cooking, so why would anyone allow her to make Coffee cakes using BA's coffee recipe!? There's no coffee in coffee cakes!"

"She wanted it to be a surprise." says Lance with sarcasm, "She just phased threw the Kitchen walls."

"It was surprise alright." says Roadblock, "Those cakes had bite."

"Beachhead wasn't happy his new jeep got blow up by sugary goo." says Wanda

"He felt better when we shipped our lot to that Cobra base." says Todd, "The blast wiped them off the Earth's face. Every single building fell and after words it even smelled well!"

The group, except Roadblock, look at him funny.

"Kitty now has to stay, at least one hundred fifty meters away." enters Roadblock, "far, far away from the Kitchen is what Hawk and the Brass say."

"Big boom. Big Flames." says Pyro, "Even I didn't known coffee could burn like napalm."

"She's embarrassed, so she's been training non stop. She became interested in ninja training after that trip to Japan with Rina and Logan. She also saw that Anime Read or Die" says Lance, "She's actually good with the neko-te." Confused looks, except from Althea and Todd, "Strong iron claws fastened to the fingers like cat claws."

"So why are you keeping tabs on your ex, Lance?" asks Althea.

"Safety. Security. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Especially your Ex."

"I got a question." says Pietro

"I sense trouble" says Wanda under her breathe.

"What are Leatherneck, Torpedo, and Wet Suit hiding?"

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**X-SCHOOL, Bayville, NY, USA**

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It's another day at the Xavier Mansion. Another disaster.

Currently, the interior of the mansion is soaked and filled with pink-white bubbles. There are little streams of soapy water flowing down the stairs, the rugs now feel like peat of a English bog, and every member of the X-Men are soaking wet.

One side are the teachers. The powerful telepath Charles Xavier, known as Professor X, the feral warrior Logan, also known as Wolverine, the weather-controlling Ororo Monroe, known as Storm, and the ape-like genius Hank McCoy, known as Beast.

Professor X started this school to help mutants for humane reasons, while Wolverine has been the subject of inhumanity when a clandestine project erased his memories and coated his bones in unbreakable adamentium. Storm has been both thief on Cairo's streets and a goddess to a small African tribe, but her greatest challenges have come from her students. Especially her nephew Spyke, who has gone from X-Men to Morlock to Murderer to Hellion to Acolyte in a matter of months. Beast may look like a giant blue ape, but he is a great doctor and scholar.

"The Misfits didn't visit today." says Ororo, "so you can't blame them this time."

On the left are students and members of the core team. Scott Summers, known as Cyclops for his mutant power to fire optical beams. Telepath and telekinetic Jean Grey, now looking more like a drowned rat then a Miss Perfect. The demonic teleporter Kurt Wagner, also known as Nightcrawler, looks miserable with his blue fur soaked.

"Fichu! Mes Cartes sont trempées!" says Gambit, holding a handful of soapy paper pulp. [Damn! My Cards are soaked!

"I'll buy you a new pack, comrade." says Colossus offering a towel.

With the X-Men also stand two former members of Magneto's elite Acolytes, Gambit (Remy LeBeau) and Colossus (Piotr Rasputin). Gambit can charge any object with explosive force, while Colossus can become a powerhouse with organic steel skin. The other member, Kitty Pryde (Shadowcat) is currently training with the Joes.

"Phis issplu phenny, yuu jurks!" says Iceman, who releases bubbles as he speaks[This isn't funny, you jerks!

Rogue towels out her soaked hair, while making sure Gambit isn't staring.

M (Monet Yvette Clarisse Maria Therese St. Croix) looks very annoyed and arrogant. She is superhuman in essentially all aspects, which has given her an a huge ego and the nickname "Miss Perfect". She joined the X-Men after the Hellions were killed and the events of the Morlock Massacre.

Her sisters Nichole, a empath, and Claudette, a bio-kinetic, are visiting the Sorcerer Supreme Dr. Strange. After spending years as souls trapped inside a magically created shell, it's a good idea to get a magical check up now and then esp since a partial loss of soul causes black magic generation.

Bobby Drake (Iceman) possesses the ability to manipulate Ice and cold. He uses his power for prank mostly and often thinks his life has become a running joke with his parents disowning him and selling his story to the tabloids and Pyro's accusations that he is a homosexual.

Rogue is last of X-Men and hardest to explain. She was born of a breeding experiment possessing the uncontrollable ability to absorb another person's powers and memories with a touch. She was later experimented on by her "father", Magneto, and gained invulnerability, flight, and super strength.

"It was all an accident." says Beast, "A long, improbable accident that would be better suited to comedy show, but an accident."

On the right side are the younger generation, known as the New Mutants.

Cannonball (Sam Guthrie), Jubilee (Jubilation Lee), Boom-Boom (Tabitha Smith), Magma (Amara Aquila), and Berzerker (Ray Crisp) of the Red Team. Mirage (Danielle Moonstar), Multiple (Jamie Madrox), and Husk (Paige Guthrie) of the Blue Team.

"I think we can explain Professor." says Cannonball, Leader of Red Team.

They have quite an array of powers. Cannonball control thermochemical energy and can become an indestructible human rocket, Jubilee has the ability to project pyrotechnic energy plasmoids (fireworks) and produce concussive blasts, Boom-Boom can produce "time bombs"- plasma globules that explode after a set time limit, and Magma controls fire and earth manipulating the molten rock of the earth.

Wolfsbane, a girl who can shape shift into a wolf or wolf-like humanoid, left after the death of code breaker Cyther at the hands of her bigoted father. Dead Girl, a near indestructible zombie that can communicate with the dead, left after several deaths including killing Rahne's father. She only returned briefly to help Warren Worthington speak to his dead girl friend. She's also the girlfriend of Dr. Strange, which has made relationships strained along with Strange's idiot apprentice Barumpbump.

Worthington's large feathery wings have gave him the codename Angel, but they were amputated after the battle of the Morlock Massacre. His life has been on a brutal downward spiral for a long time.

"At least we think we can." says Mirage, Leader of Blue Team.

Mirage can make fears and nightmares reality with her telepathic and illusion-casting abilities. Multiple with a surge of kinetic energy can split into copies of himself, making him a one man army. Husk is Cannonball's little sister and can shred her skin to reveal a new one with different properties from normal skin from stone to metal. It's a unique form of shape-shifting with unique potential.

"I wonder if I would have been better off with the Misfits?" says Rina

"I'm beginning to wonder." says Wolverine

X-23 is female clone of Wolverine created by the terrorist organization HYDRA. She has the same healing factor and adamantium claws, except instead of three claws on each hand, she has two on each hand and one in each foot. She possesses the same slowed aging, superhuman strength, stamina, agility, reflexes and senses as her "father", and is still learning to deal with people.

"No, Penny. You can't eat that!"

Skullfire (Tim Fitzgerald) and Penance (Penny) are in the yard disposing of ruined furniture and other items. Skullfire is burning stuff with his mutant power to absorb and redirect energy. Penance has dense near indestructible body with ultra-sharp hair and fingers. She's currently using those claws to tear things up and sounding very happy. She's unique in that she was originally created as magical container for

"Another day of ... ZAP!"

"Static."

"It could have been Jesse or Ray or something Forge made!"

A new member of X-Men is Scott's brother Alex Summers known as Havok. He can release energy from his hands and was separated by insane immoral mutant geneticist Mr. Sinister, who also stole there super powerful little brother Gabriel Summers known as the insanely powerful Vulcan.

Alex had a girlfriend named Polaris (Lorna Dane) She's another daughter of Magneto, who abandoned him when she learned she was a green-haired experiment and when she found Zaladane, her black haired clone possessing Wanda's powers in addition to her Magnetokinesis. She was recently possessed by a entity called Malice, after the defeat (death?) of Xavier's Multi-Powered MPD Mass Murdering son, Legion. Malice is a fusion of the negative psionic power possessed by David's combined personalities.

Static (Taylor Vandermer), a young electrokinetic originally came to Xaviers after his sister Gossamyr (Starla Vandermer) grew fairy wings grew and she started to glow. His sister left with Sunspot (Roberto "Bobby" da Costa), a young mutant with the ability to absorb solar energy and convert it into strength, flight, and fire concussive blasts, after he was revealed as a member of Hellfire Club.

"I know it was you, brat! It happened all night and only you don't need sleep!"

The only members active, but not here, are Psylocke (Elizabeth Braddock) and Goblyn (Madelyne Grey). The telepath is currently with Kitty at the Joe base. The young Sinister made clone of Jean is with Jean's Parents, visiting, with a couple of Joe bodyguards.

"So, What happened this time?" says Professor X feeling a monstrous headache.

Jean steps forward.

"Sam and Beast were moving the last of Kitty's coffee cakes, when Amara and Tabitha got into an argument. Sam tried to stop them, but Berzerker go involved. The heat from there powers set off cakes and triggered the fire alarm and sprinklers. Bobby tried to stop the water with his ice, but that broke the pipes and made things worse. Husk and Jubilee were carrying the bathroom supplies, when a wall of water hit them. The water mixed with the supplies to create a surge of foam and suds, that flowed down stairs. Jamie ran into the house and slipped on the soapy floor and slid into the kitchen, taking Rina with him. His power kicked in and a dozen Jamies and Rina ended up breaking the Pipes in the kitchen. It took a long time to stop the water, because of Forge's last experiment with water filtration."

Everyone stares at the X-Woman. How did she say all that??

"Classes are hectic." says a blushing Jean, "It's something I picked up."

"You forgot to mansion you and Scott coming out the bathroom naked in a deluge of water." says Bobby

"Deluge?" asks Jamie, ignoring the shocked X-Men.

"I heard it in a natural disaster movie."

Jean and Scott are now turning crimson with embarrassment and pray to god for a distraction, even a Misfit.

"OH MY STARS AND GARTERS!"

Ever one turns to look at Beast and watch in amazement as his blue fur changes to pale gray, to snow white, and finally to a cotton-candy pink. The fur also becomes very curly. In the end, Beast looks like Pink Gorilla from a 60s LSD trip.

There is a pause, them the mansion erupts with laughter. It's hard to tell if it's joy or insanity.

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**Hawk's Office**

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General Hawk is looking over the latest GI Joe vs Cobra Mission.

Cobra steals Gravity Point Projection Device (GPPD) from old insane scientist, Dr. Kinomi. The old scientist created the GPPD as a new form of transport, a wormhole generator, but it can be used as weapon causing distance objects, such as buildings, to implode by creating a point of super gravity within them.

While being transported, an armed conflict caused the three parts to be scattered in dangerous locations. GI Joe managed to capture the Power Core before a radiation leak could occur. Cobra managed to capture the Main Machine burying several Joes in an underground cave system. All the Joes were rescued within an hour, in time for them to help fight over the final part the Computer Core.

In the end Cobra managed to capture all three parts and assemble the GPPD at one of there larger base. The Joes managed to break into the base during a test of the machine and damaged the GPPD's energy field shielding with plastic explosives.

There was a reason why the machine was kept in three parts. The Computer Core was sensitive to the energy fields produced by the Power Core and the Main Machine, and the extremely complex computer system controls the gravity point.

KRASH!

When his men damaged the shielding, the Computer began to overload and the gravity point left it's target and headed towards the other gravity point located in the core of the main machine. The combined points created a massive gravity well, like a miniature black hole. The teams and head snakes managed to evacuate before the entire hidden base and it's plateau collapsed into a dense spherical mass.

Then the other reason the parts were separated came into play. If the exotic matter of the main power core came in contact with the gravity point of the main machine, it would collapse and cause a massive explosion. The spherical mass of debris was consumed in a nuclear level explosion.

"So Cobra won't be trying to build another GPPD?" asks General Hawk, head spinning from the technicals.

"Dr. Kinomi died of a heart attack after his life's work was stolen. He was very paranoid in his last days, so all his research, formulas, and plans were stored in the computer of the GPPD." says Airtight, "He also rigged the computer. If someone tried to download those files without his pass codes or biometric data, a virus program would wipe out all the files and if someone tried to remove the hardware, the power cells would overload and short out the whole computer."

PATATA! PATATA! "Leatherneck! Torpedo! Wet Suit! Drop those paint ball guns!"

"How did the doctor afford to create the device?" asks a confused General Hawk, slowly reaching for the Advil, "It was massive, yet he lived in remote seclusion. It must have cost millions of US dollars, yet it looked like nobody talked to him in 10 years. Where did the Exotic matter come from?"

"Dr. Kinomi's family almost died in Hiroshima. They feared the 'gaijins' would attack again and created a massive bomb shelter in an old castle. Years ago, when a cousin's electronics factory closed down for good, the good Doctor took the robotics to his lab at the castle. He used the robotics and spare parts to construct the GPPD. He even recycled parts of his older labs."

BOOM!! "B.A.! I TOLD YOU TO STAY AWAY FROM PRYDE'S RECIPE!"

Airtight proves he's a Joe and just continues.

"The matter according to the reports came from earlier experiments years before his seclusion. He and several other scientists managed to draw forth several kilos during a particle physics experiment. The other scientists died of radiation poisoning, but the Doctor survived thanks to 'family medicine' the Kinomi have been taking since the Second World War. He stole it and made it appear destroyed to prevent the 'corrupt' government from taking it."

"No wonder he had a heart attack." says General Hawk, then the phone rings.

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**Part BDark Beginnings**

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**The Pit.**

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Lifeline, Breen, and the other medics are looking better than they did yesterday.

Yesterday. Marine gunnery sergeant Ettienne R. LaFitte known as Gung-Ho found the body of a teenager on the coastline. He was with Leatherneck (Wendell A. Metzger) and Snow Job (Harlan W. Moore) checking out a possible Cobra base on Canadian soil. They found the ice-covered platform abandoned, but did find the near dead mutant dressed in a tattered school uniform.

"Lifeline, how's our patient doing.." asks General Hawk

"He would have died within minutes if the suppression collar was working correctly. His healing factor, weakened as it was, kept him alive even the with massive blood loss. Since, we were able to remove the collar, his body has regenerated the missing tissue and destroyed organs."

"Why did the collar fail?"

"That's a long explanation" says Lifeline, pulling out a sealed test tube. Inside is a extremely thin dark threads suspended in a clear preservative fluid, "A suppressor works mostly on a neurological level, by interfering with the mind and body connection. The reason the collar failed to stop the patient's special abilities completely is because he had an abnormal nervous system caused by this."

General Hawk looks inside the test tube. He sees dozens of extremely thin fuzzy threads and is quick to realize there made of even thinner threads stuck together.

"We found this implanted in his CNS. The techs says there bionano threads and was arranged in a complex network. It was able received and transmit data to the nerve tissue it surrounded so we think it was some sort of cybernetic control system"

Lifeline hands Hawk a chart showing a diagram of the nervous system with the brain and spine covered in complex yellow and green lines. The chart says "green actual network. yellow theorized"

"Bionano?"

"The threads are nanites constructed of organic molecules. They acted like a hybrid of a computer network and nerve tissue. They even possessed a protein coating patterned after the host cells to prevent an immune response.'

'The host body somehow adapted and altered his protein signature, which caused the immune system to attack the network. The network tried to shutdown his healing factor to protect itself, but it was too late as there was already an immune response.'

'The suppressor was designed to stop his powers when the network failed, but the collar slowed down the destruction of the threads. The collar and damaged network caused conflicting signals, which caused both to lose effectiveness."

'When the collar was removed, the healing factor went back to work and destroyed the remaining network. The patient is completely free of all control."

"More experimentation on mutants." says Hawk with a grimace, "Is the boy awake yet?"

"WHEEEE!!" CRASH!

"What the Hell!" says a unfamiliar voice

"He is now." says Lifeline

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**Infirmary**

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A dark figure clad in a hospital gown is in the Joe medical bay. He's a tall Caucasian male in his late teens with dark skin and short silver hair. The most unique distinguishing feature is his eyes. He has silvery eyes that shine in the darkness and the sclera (whites) are pitch black. They are the eyes of a feral mutant which is also proven by animal-like canine teeth, sharp nails, and tapered ears.

The dark-skinned feral mutant is lying on a white medical bed covered by a clean sheets and one asexual genetically engineered assassin high on Chips Ahoy.

Xi who managed to steal another bag of chocolate chip cookies, is currently hugging him.

"New friends! New hugs! New friend to hug!"

"O. K." says the silver blond slowly, "Shouldn't you introduce yourself first."

"Xi. I'm a genetically engineered assassin created by Cobra. Number 11!" says Xi bouncing on the man's chest, "Now I'm a Misfit, a member of GI Joe and called Xi. Xi loves hugs and cookies."

"I can't remember much, but I think my name is Nicholas At least that's what I remember someone calling me" says the feral "I think I'm around 180 cm tall (5ft 11). I'm a feral mutant possessing a powerful healing factor. At least that would explain the claws, fangs, and why I remember having a huge hole in my side.."

"It's good to see that your awake, Nicholas. I'm Dr. Edwin C. Steen Codename: Lifeline" says Lifeline as he enters with General Hawk, "This is General Hawk.. Your in our military base known as the Pit. How much do you remember?"

"Not much Doctor." says Nicholas, "I remember having a severe headache in a class room and two of my class mates trying to grab me. I ran into the woods, but when I reached the cliffs I remember a sharp pain in my back and my muscles locking up. The last thing I remember is falling into the ocean surrounded by red. I don't remember the town's name or my friends or my family."

"Do you remember any other mutants?" asks General Hawk.

"Yeah.." says Nicholas his silver on black eyes widening, " My classmates, the two who tried to grab me. They weren't just mutants, they were the type. Feral."

"Three ferals in one class? That's weird. " says Toad as he hops in. He's followed by Wavedancer, Avalanche, Blob, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, Shipwreck, Lowlight and Roadblock. "Imagine, a whole class like Wolverine, X23, and Thornn. Or Worse like Sabretooth and Feral!"

"Toddles, you know I love you." says Wavedancer, "but please be quiet."

"Yes dear." says Toad

"Whipped" says Quicksilver

Whack! KRACK!"

... before his sister uses a hex bolt to whip him with a nearby extension cord.

"We managed to find your student ID!"

The group turns to see the three faces of evil. The Delgato genius telekinetic mutant triplets. Trinity. Daria with the ponytail on the right, Quinn with the ponytail on the left, and Brittany with pigtails.

"We used a probe and the Mass device to teleport all matter with your DNA trace." says Daria.

"All except for the sea water, we didn't want your blood." says Quinn, "At least Today."

"We managed to find a few clothing scraps, your student ID and your wallet" says Brittany, "We also found a few pieces of your pulverized kidney."

"I'll take the wallet and ID, please" says Nicholas, "You can flush what's left my kidney. I grew a new one."

Quinn hands him the student ID, which shows him smiling showing his fangs.

Nicholas Dark.

Age: 18. Born: December 21.

Genesis Academy Code: G12T36N108 Expire: 10/26

Emergency call Gene Johnson. (519) 555-0108

Brittany hands him his wallet. An Academy Banking Card, Motorcycle Driver's License, and nine hundred in damp Canadian dollars. "$900 in small bills?"

"Genesis Academy." says Arcade, typing on his personalized Blueberry, "It's a small private school with according to the school 120 'Elite' students, 12 teachers, and 36 'tutors'. The address is missing and I think the phone number is fake."

"Hellfire?" says Lance, "A large school of soldier mutants."

"I'm guessing secret government like that Weapon X." says Althea, "Hellfire would have a wider array and would use brainwashing, instead of bionano cybernetic implants."

"Wanna make a bet?" says Lance with a smirk

"One turn Babysitting Lil' C, Beaky, and Tadpole." says Althea with a shark-like grin

Lance suddenly turns pale and nervous. He then steels himself, "Deal"

"You should check your pills for side effects." says Althea with a smirk, "It's making you suicidal"

"How did you learn the implants?" says a semi-shocked Lifeline, "I only got the report this morning."

"Never underestimate the power of invisibility" says Althea, as Xi blushes, giggles, then hops in place.

"So Lifeline, I'm fully healed?" asks Nicholas, watching Xi look into the black mirror surface of a monitor, "'implants' are no longer a problem?"

He decides he wants out before the stoned Xi does a Nostradamus and predicts the future.

"You back at full power Nicholas thanks to your accelerated healing. The control network is gone completely. Destroyed and consumed by your mutant immune system."

"In that case, can I get some actual food and some clothing. I can smell the hospital food from here and this gown doesn't hide much

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**The Mess Hall**

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I should have known."

Nicholas Dark is now dressed in a tight dark purple shirt, black pants with charcoal grey bandages wrapped around the lower legs, and black military boots. With his short white hair and mutant traits, he resembles a character from one of Toad's manga.

**"PIETRO DROP THE POTATOES!!"**

**"TOAD WATCH OUT!!"**

**"XI! NO MORE COOKIES!"**

**"NO COFFEE!"**

Nicholas walks over to Arcade and whispers in his ear. Arcade looks at him then pulls out a thick manila folder marked "THE MISFITS: An Introduction for Recruits". Nicholas hands over a bit of cash and then goes to a corner.

Nicholas goes threw the file quickly, while eating a plate of chicken, fries, and sandwiches,.his face showing confusion, amusement, dismay, and a little angry. He ignores the chaos around him. He notices at the bottom of the file is a quote by Lowlight,

'These people may be lunatics, they may be the most uncivilized, insane group of weirdos and crazies that ever walked the planet, but at least they don't make me feel like I have to do anything to change myself to fit in!'

"XI! Back away from the Chips Ahoy!"

"So I guess were going up north to investigate, yo?" asks Toad

"Normally they would send Alpha Flight" says Althea, "but they have problems with a base in the Alaska"

"So Nick, what do you think?" asks Roadblock, "Does our group make you blink?"

"You could say that, Roadblock. There a group of nuts, but I think there good nuts."

"Almond. Butternut. Brazilnut. Cashew. Chestnuts. Coconut. Hazelnut. Macadamia. Peanut. Pecan. Pistachio..." says Xi with a crumb and chocolate covered mouth.

"How long will those cookies last?" asks Nicholas, "I have a feeling I wasn't a touchy feely person."

"Another two or three hours I guess, I hope he doesn't make too big a mess. When cookies are involved it's true, we Joes are hugged black and blue. " says Roadblock with a sigh, "So what do you think of our place, not bad for an army base.'

'Yes, I'm acting as your recruiter, hope you end up better than Shane Shooter. He was a gang leader who got caught by the police, joining the Misfits was his release. The chaos he could not face, so left to be a pirate in outer space.We still miss his loss, but I hope you aren't afraid of the chaos."

**"PIETRO! DROP THE PIE!" **

**SPLAT! **

**"DIE!!" **

**BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!**

"Maybe you should be wary" says the embarrassed Joe.

"You must have a rhyming dictionary." says Nicholas with a raised eyebrow and a smirk "Right now I need a cure. I need my past to have a future."

"Don't worry. We'll help you. We'll find out what is true."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Part CChibi-Misfits**

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**General Hawk's Office**

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Paper work. If there one thing Brigadier Genera Clayton M. Abernathy hates about being the commander of GI Joe, it's paper work. General Hawk sits in his office surrounded by paper work. Four two foot tall piles on his desk and six five-foot piles behind him.

Reports on Cobra.

Damage Reports.

Insurance.

Damage assessments.

Medical Files.

Mission Reports.

Equipment Replacements

Supply Orders

Repair Budget.

With the chaos and insanity that surrounds the Joes and there Misfits, the amount of generated papers is astounding. If it wasn't all 100 recycled paper, Green Peace would surround the base like protesters surround Xavier's mansion. Hawk has lost more blood from paper cuts then from Cobra troops and right now he's almost wishing Pyro would walk in.

The phone next to him rings and with a sigh he answers it.

"Hello. General Hawk speaking."

#Hello. This is Dr. Williams at NY-P Hospital. A unique situation has come up and we require several Joes or Misfits for multiple patient pickup."

"What's the situation?"

#As you know, since that fiasco with Reverend William Stryker, there have been many abandoned young mutants?#

"Yes. In fact, we adopted at mutant baby that was abandoned at St. Vincent's Hospital in Sheldon Falls."

#Then you already understand the Situation.#

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**NY-P Hospital**

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Roadblock, Covergirl, Lowlight, Wavedancer, Toad, and Xi meet Doctor Williams in his office.

Dr. Williams is a tall, thin Caucasian man with short gray hair, a thick beard, and glasses. He's dressed in pale blue clothing covered by a white doctor's coat. He holds one small folder and two nearly empty folders. He also stands next to a bed seating three playing children.

The first is a small dark skin girl the same age as Beaky. She has brown eyes and black hair, and her small form is clad in a black T-shirt and black pants. She looks completely human.

"Angel Salvadore. She's the only child with complete records. Her abusive step-father killed his wife in a drunken rage and was later killed resisting arrest. A later blood test alerted us to her mutant state. Recently parents have been demanding the test before they will adopt a child."

"Epsilon Level Mutant. I'm detecting insectoid traits." says Xi brushing the baby's hair. She notices the Doctor's inquiring stare. "I can read DNA by being in physical contact."

"Useful ability. Epsilon Level? Oh dear. I read about the new scale 'no chance of having a regular life in society due to their major flaws. '"

The second is a mutant girl the size of a toddler with a blue skin. She has Asian heritage with blue eyes lack pupils or sclera and her hair is actually hundreds of thin dark blue tendrils. She also has long arms and small blue teeth.

"A couple found the baby girl in there swimming pool. She was lucky she picked those two, since the neighbors are FOH. They brought her in her in a fish tank because she kept slipping out of there arms."

Xi moves to the aquatic mutant and touches the baby's left arm, which causes tiny ripples.

"Her body is composed of an organic gel. Her recently activated powers are Elasticity and Liquification. The ability to stretch, deform, expand and contract one's body into any form they can imagine and the ability to partially or completely into a liquid. She can also breathe underwater."

"I guess Lil' C will have another person to play underwater tag with." says Toad

The third mutant child is an insectoid mutant. She has skin ranging from slightly orange yellow to reddish-orange covered in black brown chitinous scales like an exoskeleton. She has short silky white hair and pure black eyes lacking sclera making them look larger than normal. She also has small antenna, small claws on her hands and feet, and tiny pair of fangs. She dressed in a black shirt with red overhauls.

"Semi-Insectoid Anatomy. Strangest thing. Her hands and feet are covered in retractable setae- tiny stiff hairs. She was abandoned outside the hospital and when he found her she was crawling up the wall."

She also grabs Xi's finger when he reaches for her. Xi's eyes widen for a second, surprised at the genetic information she receives.

"Enhanced Human Strength and Durability. Great jumping ability. Her antenna pick up vibrations like a motion detector. As you mentioned her hands and feet are covered in setae allowing wall climbing, but she will be able to secrete chemical fluids when she gets older.'

'There's also evidence of tampering. She been granted Kinetic Memory."

"Kinetic Memory???" asks the Doctor and Toad.

"A computer mind like that girl Tessa" says Xi, "Photographic Memory. Instant Recall. Multi-Tasking. A living supercomputer with infinite memory. Someone enhanced her mental abilities in utero, it also boosted her speed and reflexes."

"That is sickening." says Dr. Williams, "I wonder why she was abandoned, if they spent so much time altering her genetics."

"Either she was considered a failure and the disposal guy was more humane." says Wavedancer, "or someone rescued her, but couldn't take care of her."

KLACK!

The group turns to see the babies now holding the remains of various medical gear. Little Angel is smacking the stethoscope into a wall, the little gel girl is drinking a IV bag of saline solution, and the bug girl has pulled a Mechanical sphygmomanometer (blood pressure meter) apart.

"Hey stop!" says Dr. Williams only for the gel girl to slime him.

"There Misfits alright!" says Toad

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**A few minutes later**

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Over two decades ago, COBRA stole an experimental teleportation unit, known as the MASS device, which had the ability to transport matter to any global location, using a satellite to relay the teleportation beam. GI Joe had to build there own MASS device to counter and Cobra needed to refuel. The fuel for both devices was three rare elements consisting of radioactive crystals, heavy water found in the depths of the ocean, and fragments from a giant meteorite floating in a volcano's red-hot lava. In the process, the fuel sources were lost and the machines were rendered unusable after the adventure.

A few years ago, the mutant genius triplets known as Trinity changed the MASS device to run on grape juice! The Misfits now use the MASS device to travel anywhere on Earth, for operations against COBRA and other terrorists, for Rescue missions, and for annoying the X-Men.

Roadblock, Covergirl, Lowlight, Wavedancer, Toad, and Xi use the MASS device to return to the PIT holding the three new members of the family. Avalanche, Blob, Pietro, Scarlet Witch, Dragonfly, and Pyro are there to meet the new arrivals, while Beachhead is yelling at General Hawk and Scarlet

"This is crazy! Three more babies!! We are the military, not a mutant orphanage!!"

Suddenly, the little gel girl fires a tiny jet of slime from her mouth hitting the back of Beachhead's head. Beachhead turns to yell at the baby, but sees the look in the eyes of the women. He slowly turns and walks away, he may be mad but he's not that crazy.

"So what are there names?" says Scarlet Witch.

"Only this little cutie has a name." Wavedancer holds Angel in her arms. "Angel Salvadore."

The little bug girl is held in Toad's arms and staring wide eye at Dragonfly. Dragonfly is blushing at the child's attention. Toad walks over to her and places the little bug girl in the insectoid medics arms. The little girl snuggles up and Lina's blush increases.

"Amber." says Dragonfly, "She reminds me of amber. She the same orange-yellow and she precious like a Gem"

"How CUUTTTEE!!" says Quicksilver teasing, before Gel girl nails him with her slime. He's then hit by Wanda's hex bolt sending him sliding at high speed into some trashcans.

Cover Girl stands next to the little aquatic shape shifter. The toddler's arm has extended and wrapped around Cover girl's arm like a python. She acts shy and innocent, but everyone recognizes the mischief in her eyes, the same found in the main Misfits.

"Ran"

The group turns to see late arrivals, Angelica and Nicholas.

"She looks Japanese or Japanese-descendant." Nicholas explains. "It means 'orchid' in Japanese. It's also means 'chaos' and 'riot'. Ran is also found in words like ran'un 'rain cloud', ranchaa 'launcher' and ranmyaku which means 'disorder', 'confusion', and 'chaos'. It's also the name of a sea goddess in Norse mythology."

The group, including the babies, stare at him

"I've been watching Anime and reading a lot"

Cover Girl kneels down and asks, "So what do you think of the name 'Ran'?"

The girl smiles and nods.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**The End of Episode 01**

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**Epilogue**

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A figure sits in the shadows of his lab. A tall man with a high collar with glinting glasses.

Around him, there are monkeys and apes.

White faced Capuchin monkeys, brown and grey Rhesus Macaque, and black faced African green monkeys (Chlorocebus) are locked in metal cages. They are quiet as if too scared to speak.

Common Chimpanzees are locked in clear plastic wall chambers with metal edges.

Most of them have metal collars around there necks. Some have arms bands with laminated bar codes. Some have missing or mutated limbs.

Two figures walks in, but remain hidden in the shadows.

"Send them in."

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Over 7400 words in a single chapter

**Don't Forget to Vote for Costumes in my "Halloween World" BTVS crossover **

Buffy, Joyce, and Dawn Summers Ends **December 1**


	2. Babies Day Out

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**AEON MISFITS**

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A X-Men Evo Misfits crossover by Spaceman

newfiespaceman yahoo.ca

www dot fanfiction dot net slash spaceman

Written from December 01, 2007 to December 03, 2007

Edited January 26, 2008

* * *

**DISCLAIMER**

X-Men Evolution is the property of Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, Marvel, and Co.

GI Joe is the property of Hasbro, Marvel, and other companies.

Misfits is the property of Red Witch. Permission Given.

Original chars belong to me.

This is a work of fan fiction for non-profit entertainment purposes only.

No profit or offense intended.

* * *

Author's Notes

KEY

Sound **LOUD SOUND**

telepathy mental command

#phone# Computer Screen

(1) Warning 1st chapter is wordy, a lot of intros. For those who haven't read Red Witch

(2) Most OC names come from "most popular names" and "most common surnames" lists.

(3) Foreign languages come from Internet Translator.

* * *

**EPISODE 02: Babies Day Out**

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THE PIT, Florida, USA 11:05 AM

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nicholas Dark is on a couch watching TV, when Toad and Wavedancer walk in.

"Hey Nick" says Althea with a smirk. "You managed to escape from the Triplets?"

"Thank God for a Healing Factor! Those little maniacs tried electro-shock to jog my memory."

"Why did it take less than an hour?" says the mutant mermaid, "They usually keep a 'guinea pig' for at least a few hours unless your very boring."

"According to the Doc, I do more than just heal. I have a bunch of bonus abilities. Foreign Chemical Immunity, Immunity to Disease, Retarded Aging, Enhanced Senses, and Superhuman Stamina, Reflexes, and Agility. I also have a minor reactive adaptation ability, which allows me to adapt to harmful stimulus and shutdown my pain receptors if the stimulus becomes too intense."

"Huh?" says Toad

"What it means Toad is when the three maniacs were shocking me, my body rapidly built up a resistance. I'm now immune to tazers and super-charged cattle prods. Don't ask."

Scarlet Witch and Xi walks in, followed by Blob, Avalanche, Firestar,and Dragonfly. Quicksilver whose limping, walks in last. He's holding his ass and glaring at his fraternal twin.

"What did Quickie do now?"

"Claudius, Beaky, and Tadpole were getting vaccinations with the other babies, when the moron came in a scared them. It took an hour to calm them down."

"Actually, I think they were faking the last 45 minutes." says Xi

"Jinx was helping Bree and she got made" say Lance wincing at the memory, "and she was still holding the needles."

Nicholas remembers the chart the male Joes and Misfits gave him when he learning the basics. The Misfit and Joe Female Avoidance Month (MAJFAM) Chart which listed the cycles of every female on the Base and when to avoid them at all cost.

"You dumbass."

Suddenly, Trinity comes in holding a covered plate.

"We have new inventions." says Daria, with the ponytail on the right spoke.

"Actually, it's addition to an old invention." says Quinn, with the ponytail on the left spoke.

"Teleport badges." says Brittany, with pigtails.

"We already have watchs." says Toad

"The badges leave your hands free." says Daria, "You can wears bracers or sensor gear during a mission."

"There made of nanofibers that meld with your clothing." says Quinn, "When not in use, they are stored as cookie-size discs"

"The bad guy would have to strip you to get them and they can be hidden as a pattern on your clothing. ." says Britanny with a smile, "We're working on a tattoo version that binds to the skin instead of cloth."

Nicholas lifts the lid on the plate and sees a plate of circular cookies, the same sort eaten by babies.

"Oh ."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NYC Zoo11:59 AM

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There is a small flash in the monkey cage and Angel Salvadore appears with one of the "cookies" in her mouth. As her mouth opens the disc falls down and melds into her jumper becoming a patch..She's about to cry out when she sees the monkeys and giggles.

The monkeys scared by the flash quickly begin to enjoy the presence of the strange infant.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A few meters away, another group of strange people appear. They include Cobra Commander, Dr. Mindbender, Tomax, Xamot, Destro, and five Cobra Vipers

"Dr. Mindbender, are you sure this will work??"

"Yes Cobra Commander. The formula with cause mutations in the primates similar to natural mutations in humans. We select a group of ape, give them powers, and control there primitive minds with the new cybernetic gear. A cheap supply of superhuman soldiers."

"Why can't we use this stuff on humans?"

"Human cells mutate and continue to mutate out of control. They become aggressive, spread threw the subject, and become hostile to other cells. Our last human test subject became a mass of different cancer cells and necrotic tissue."

"Why don't we use lab monkey?"

"Because my last lab assistant was a member of PETA." says Dr. Mindbender turning a shade of red, "He shot me, destroyed my computer, freed my test animals, and burnt my CD collection!!"

"I remember the bill."

"I've loaded the formula into darts which can be fired from those air guns I gave each of you. Select A for the Formula and Select B for a Tranq"

"Why are we doing this at the Zoo instead of just stealing the apes?" asks Destro

There is a long pause.

"A glitch in a formula, OK!" says Dr. Mindbender, "The formula needs to be injected before the tranq or it will become inert. If you wait too long after injecting the formula, the tranq will become less effective and they need to be unconscious or the pain of the mutation will drive them insane and uncontrollable."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lil' Angel is laughing at the acrobatics of one of the monkeys, when a red-tipped dart hits him in the shoulder cause it a screech before a second blue dart hits him causing him to fall to the cage floor. Angel is very scared, but she's hidden by the tree leaves.

As Tomax and Xamot use thermal knives to cut the cage wire to enter and retrieve the monkey, Angel notices a toy ball and remembers what Claudie did when pickle head took one of his toys.

The ball hits Tomax in the face causing him to step back onto a piece of rotten fruit. The elite COBRA soldier slips and falls hard, breaking the cheap plastic air guns and driving one of the tranq darts into his side. Tomax is out like a light, either from the fall or the drug.

"Tomax" yells Xamot, "Filthy little monkey!"

Xamot forgetting he's holding the air gun and not his laser pistol, fires a couple shots into the trees. The darts, obeying "Sorting Algorithm Of Mortality" misses Angel by wide margins bounces off several tree limbs and flies back towards Xamot.

Xamot avoids one dart, but jumps into the path of the second. He collapses on to his brother in way which stain the minds of children that witness it.

Angel looks at her monkey friend, then looks for the faces of the Misfits or Joes.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dr. Mindbender and three of the Vipers are near the Gorilla cage. They take sniping position on a walkway over the enclosure. The tour computer replays a message

"The Gorilla are very aggressive this time of year, as it's time for making babies."

Angel is crawling near the bottom of the walkway ladder, when one of her legs gets caught on a cable. A quick yank and she's free to look for help for her monkey friend. That same yank causes a loose piece of lighting to swing free. It smashes one of the Vipers to fall like dominoes and Dr. Mindbender to fall over the railing

The mad scientist lands on something soft, gray, and furry. The former dentist slowly turns to see a very angry silver-back gorilla.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cobra Commander is on his knees trying to a fix a spring in his air gun.

"Why is mine broke!?"

"Why don't you take mine, Cobra Commander?" says Destro drinking a six dollar cup of coffee.

"I rather not be here." says Cobra Commander wiping his mask, "Why did I have to come on this mission?"

"Most of our men are on..."

"Angel!"

Cobra Commander and Destro turn to see a group of Misfits arrive and Althea Delgado picking up a dark skinned baby. The two COBRA leaders hide in the bushes next to the Rhino enclosure, Destro's coffee tossed careless.

"What are they doing here!?!?!"

"I do not know, Cobra..."

They here a snort and turn to see a charging adult rhino, coffee steam coming from it's face. The badly mad fence collapses on Destro turning him into a human waffle, while Cobra Commander gets the horn to his rear.

**"EEEAAAYYYYAAAAHHHH!!!!!!"**

The Misfit group turns to see a Rhino running away with Cobra Commander stuck like a rotten Caramel Apple on a stick! Everyone winces, except Angel whose monkey friend lands next to her on a post, eyes glowing slightly.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Snake's Garage

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Dreadnoks are working on there bikes, while Cobra Commander is on his mission. They are using Snake's Garage because it's the closest to the Zoo. They are too busy working and messing up each other lives to notice a flash a few minutes ago behind the gas tank.

Amber is about to wail, but then she notices the shine of the various metal objects and becomes fascinated. She begins to crawl across the metal surfaces of the garage, exploring every part.

"There messed up pretty bad." says the mechanic snake look at each of Dreadnok machines.

"How bad is it,Doc?" says Monkeywrench.

Amber crawls by a bench causing a metal rod to roll and hit a case of beer. The unopened beer slides down a piece of metal resting against the bench and tumbles into the back of a convertible. As it lands, it opens partially and one of the beer slides out. It's quickly followed by a brown paper package that releases a small cloud of powder as it lands.

"You might have to get a few Stockers as these Ratbikes are near dead."

Amber finds a bottle marked "Chain Lube" and gives it a squeeze. The Motorbike chain lubrication oil sprays one of the bike seats. After the spray goes down, she tosses it away and continues to explore.

"I have no idea what you managed to get into the Superchargers, but air flow is down."

Amber finally gets close to the Dreadnok personal vehicles. She looks at all the fascinating shapes inside one of the bikes and picks up a set of very shiny tools. After thinking about sucking on one for a minute, she instead begins to poke them in and out of the machine.

A bolt falls out, followed by oil, followed by a piece of a tube, followed by...

"The Nitrous lines are damaged, which means you could splatter your little brains if you lose your lids."

Amber goes from bike to bike, repeating her actions to produce the same noises.

"The Radiators and fuel pumps should have been replaced a year ago!"

When Snake finishes, the Dreadnoks are in tears. They were bikers long before they were mercenaries and learning that there old machines are in horrible condition cuts deep.

Suddenly, Kelly walks in.

"Mr. Snake is my car ready yet. I need to get to an appointment at.."

He stops seeing the Dreadnoks in Snake's office. He remembers the Cobra goons and screams like a little girl. He runs like a madman, jumps into his convertible, and takes off.

As he goes down the street, he promises himself to go to professionals no matter how much it costs next time. It has to be cheaper than the insanity caused by those bikers. He does notice the cloud of powder he's breathing as he panics.

He sees a red light and slows down and begins to calm his self. The light changes and he begins to go down a hill. He presses the brake, but one of the beer cans is under the pedal

The car fails to make a turn, flies off the road, and slams into a pole crushing the front. Kelly passes out on the air bag. The police soon arrive to investigate the accident and find the Senator, an open case of beer, and package full of drugs in the back seat.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At the Garage, the Dreadnok got on there bikes when they heard the sound of cop cars.

They didn't get far.

Zartan and his family manage to leap clear before there smoking machines explode into balls of fire. They manage to escape without harm, but there monkey and documents are incinerated.

Ripper's bike is ripped apart and slides into a road sign sending the biker flying into a trash bin.

Buzzer's bike goes out of control and sends him under the machine of a roadside worker. The slide is tight enough that it shaves a line of hair off Buzzer's head.

Torch's bike ignites and he jumps off holding his burning rear end.

Monkeywrench's bike covered in motor oil slides out from under him, causing him to skid across the road and get his head caught in a sewer grate.

Roadpig's bike slows to crawl before stopping in the middle of the road. Then a large truck hits him.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Amber!"

Amber finds herself in Dragonfly's warm arms and quickly snuggles.

"What's a mutant baby doing in my Garage?" asks Snake, he doesn't have problems with mutants, but a lot of his clients do and he needs to maintain his rough exterior.

"I'm glad she didn't get hurt!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Greenglade Senor Citizen Residence

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ran slides down the halls of the retirement home. She flows across surfaces and flows down stairs, exploring the funny smelling place. She slides against the temperature controls near an office.

"Did you hear, Jack?" asks a young man in white, "Some politician is here talking about anti-mutant policy. The boss renting the space since they cut the budget"

"I know Gil. A large group of hardcore FOH that didn't jump ship when there boss got shot." says the other man in white, Jack, "There are also those Purity guys that didn't abandon Reverand after that Sunday mess. I have a cousin who grew two more arms after that mess and he is the only member I'm still talking to."

As the two talk, they don't notice a tiny blue hand extend and grabs a couple of pill bottles. Ran shakes her new rattles and continues to crawl/flow down the hall.

As she reaches the meeting hall, she smells the sweet aroma of cookies. She tosses her "rattles" away and slides into the room with the cookies.

The two bottles of pills are thrown into an overhead fan, which manages to break the child-proof caps of the bottles. One bottle hits the rim of a punch bowl, before rolling behind a garbage can, but not before losing the pills into the juice mix

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nicholas, Arcade, and Firestar arrive at the home to find Ran in the arms of an elderly couple reading her a bed time story. The old couple's children haven't visited in years and there great-grandchildren are already out of school. They don't care if the baby is blue and soft as a water bottle, they just like the company.

"I guess we lucked out." says Nicholas, "I thought I saw a FOH logo outside."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the meeting room, the FOH and Purity are acting like inmates at a mental hospital

"I can fly! I can fly! Ahh! I'm not a Mutie!"

"Mutants! Mutants! Everywhere!"

"I don't wanna! I don't wanna!"

"The sky is falling!"

The two orderlies, Jack and Gil, investigate and then notice the plastic bottle behind a trash still containing a few large, round, green pills.

"500mg Citlaz. 270 is a 3 month supply." says Jack, "Powerful."

"Giant Toad! I'm not a fly!! Not a Fly!"

"Where are you mommy? I'm lost mommy.!"

"The sky is falling!"

The orderlies look at each other, leave the way the came in, and lock the door behind them.

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Epilogue

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The PIT

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I'm so glad there OK!" says Dragonfly hugging Amber

"There Misfits." says Nicholas, "Worry for Babysitters, not the Babies."

"Where's Angel's monkey?" says Blob.

The monkey they found with Angel refused to leave and when they saw the glowing eyes, they decided it better come with them.

"AAAHHHH! BAD MONKEY! DON'T BITE THAT! WAAHHH! THAT EITHER!!!"

"Playing with Beachhead." answers Toad

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Senator Kelly arrives at the Greenglade Senor Citizen Residence. He's a mess from his accident and trying to explain the alcohol and drugs in his car. He managed to "make bail" with a check, but he wonders if this meeting with Purity and FOH is worth it.

He notices the elderly are still in the TV rooms and own rooms instead of the meeting hall.

He notices the door is locked, but the key is still in the lock. With a click the door opens.

"Hungry."

"Giant Chicken."

"BRAAIINNSS!"

The Senator is grabbed by the hands of crazed druggies into the hall before the door is locked behind him. The Senator's screams can be heard from behind the thick door.

**END**


	3. Strange Actions

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**AEON MISFITS**

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A X-Men Evo Misfits crossover by Spaceman

newfiespaceman yahoo.ca

www dot fanfiction dot net slash spaceman

Written:

January 29 - 08, 2008

February 11 - 12, 2008

February 20 - 21, 2008

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DISCLAIMER

X-Men Evolution is the property of Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, Marvel, and Co.

GI Joe is the property of Hasbro, Marvel, and other companies.

Misfits is the property of Red Witch. Permission Given.

Original chars belong to me.

This is a work of fan fiction for non-profit entertainment purposes only.

No profit or offense intended.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Author's Notes

**KEY**

Sound **LOUD SOUND**

_telepathy mental command_

#phone# Computer Screen

(1) Warning 1st chapter is wordy, a lot of intros. For those who haven't read Red Witch

(2) Most OC names come from "most popular names" and "most common surnames" lists.

(3) Foreign languages come from Internet Translator.

_This is an experiment with action instead of comedy. _

_There will be some humor at the beginning and end, but most of this will be action scenes._

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**EPISODE 03: STRANGE ACTIONS**

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New York Downtown Hospital

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A young doctor walks down the sterile halls followed by a group of medical students. He's a tall, thin man with short black hair and blue eyes behind glasses. The students are younger and range in ethnicity and style. They are all dressed in white hospital coats with ID cards. The teacher's ID reads "Dr. Jonathan Williams MD"

They walk up to a window and look inside the room. In the center of the room is a small humanoid figure covered in bandages from head to toe with restraints on the legs and arms and a metal frame around the torso. There are numerous bags of clear and yellow fluid with IV lines leading into the patients arms and torso. There is also a oxygen mask, a hair bag, and wires leading to monitors.

"Patient 509 is a very unique case. The subject almost died in that recent explosion and was suffering from severe burns over ninety percent of the body with extensive muscle damage and broken bones. We didn't expect the subject to live past the few hours, but the subject proved us wrong. A genetic test later revealed that the subject is one of the that possesses an x gene."

"A Mutant!?" yells several students.

"Yes, a mutant, but don't be alarmed." says the Doctor, "The media would have you believe all mutants are dangerous monsters, but there are mutants that possess benign abilities. No silly powers like laser eye beams, but an accelerated healing process that enables the subject to regenerate damaged or destroyed tissue with far greater efficiency than an ordinary . When those FOH loons released that Legacy plague they used a mutant 'healing factor' to cure it and a later learned from an Immunologist that they could do that will all diseases."

"So are you pro-mutant?" asks one dark skinned woman in the back.

"I do believe some of the more powerful mutants should be monitored, Miss Reyes. Magneto's magnetic powers have far too much abuse potential. Those mutants that possess simple mutations like unbreakable bone or ability to breathe underwater can be ignored."

"So what kind of mutant is this one?" asks a African-American man on the left.

"A very interesting one. We first believed the subject possessed a powerful healing factor, but we later learned the current healing was a side effect. When the subject's mutant genes were triggered, the subject's body began to recreate itself on a molecular biological level. All we needed to do is feed in nutrient lines and keep the body stable."

Slowly, the group moves on and the patient is left to sleep.

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Late Night

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Patient 509 slowly pulls free of Morpheus's hold.

Memories appear slowly, but soon gain speed.

_Where am I? A Hospital. I feel something wrapped around my body. Smells bad. Bandages._

_I was on my way to the meeting, when I started to feel sick. I ran into the subway washroom and collapsed on the floor, the cramps were getting better when there was an explosion. I remember the washroom collapsing and fire covering me._

The patient brings it's bandaged right hand into it's vision, not noticing the broken restraint hanging from the wrist. The subject pulls and tears off the medicated bandages to reveal a smooth dark tanned hand, completely healthy and intact.

_I remember my hands on fire. There should be scars at least. How long was I out?_

"The mutie is in here."

_A mutant? _thinks Patient 509 looking left and right, _I'm the only one here. A mutant._

"Damn doctors. If they wanted to treat animals, they should have become vets! Hospitals are for humans!"

Patient 509 watches as two large men in jackets and ski masks break in. They have FOH logos on there shirts, which causes the patient to freak out. There is a screech of metal as the framework around the chest breaks part and the other restraints snap.

"Die Mutant!"

The two bigots open fire with a pair of machine pistols, as the person in the bed tries to shield with it's arms. The bandages on the chest and arms are torn apart by the high velocity impacts

There is a pause and the shocked patient quickly realizes he's not hurt and the two FOH realize they are in trouble. 509 gets off the bed, cracks the neck, and runs at the two armed men. They try to shoot the mutant again, but 509 knocks there guns out of there hands, breaking fingers in the process. The super durable mutant lifts both men and throws them threw the observation window and into the wall hard enough to leave an deep impression. This is impressive by itself, but the window is armor laminated and the wall is painted board-covered concrete.

"Patient 509!?" says Dr. Williams coming to check on his favorite patient, only to find to bloody broken FOH men lying beneath a crater in the wall.

The mutant turns to the doctor, pauses, then tears the bandages from his mouth.

"My name is Michael X Brown." says the mutant with an odd voice, "What the F is wrong my voice."

"Mr. Brown. You found after a bombing and the activation of your mutant powers healed your body after a two week period. Wait... Michael?"

"What about it?" says Mr. Brown rubbing his throat, "It's the second most common name in '06"

"That would explain the male ID we found near you." mumbles the doctor looking shocked.

"Wha??"

Mr. Brown rips off the bandages a smooth dark tan face with long thick dark red hair and green eyes. It would be a very beautiful face if the person behind it wasn't male. Michael stares at the feminine face in shock. It isn't even a female (sister) version of his own face, it's hyper female with shorter lower jaw, fuller lips, and slightly larger eyes. If anybody said this face had once been male, they would be locked up in a mental hospital.

Mr. Brown looks down at his smaller, lithe form and tears the bandages from his chest.

A cry fills the halls of the hospital as Mr. Brown discovers he's now Miss Brown.

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Knight Apartments

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Jonathan Jordan Jones wakes up feeling awful with a pounding headache, cramped muscles, and a foul taste in his mouth. His eyes slowly open, whimpering as light lances them like little lances and finds himself not in his little apartment

His small apartment is very different, with sealed boxes of comics, tapes, and DVDs, a laptop computer on a desk and a DVD player next to it. He also has a Playstation 3 hooked up to the TV and the games like King of Fighters, Mortal Kombat: Armageddon , God of War, Devil May Cry, Hitman, Final Fantasy VII, a trio of Prince of Persia games, and Meta Gear.Solid 3. A slacker's paradise according himself and secured by numerous locks on the door.

The room Jonathan is in is a party house. The strong smell of BBQ and Fast Food mixed with smoke and the garlic smell of marijuana. He looks around and sees liquor bottles. Several brands of vodka, Bombay Sapphire gin, Jack Daniel's whiskey and a unknown brand of bourbon,Captain Morgan rum, Silver patron tequila, several brands of beer, and wine coolers. The bare essentials for a bar, but he also sees a few odd drinks such as Bacardi 151, Ever clear, a bottle of the Newfoundland Screech and the green Absinthe.

There are the remains of greasy burgers, steaks, sausages, and pork chops. He can also see chicken wing buckets, empty bags of chips, and three boxes that once contained Stuffed Crust Double-Cheeseburger Pizzas. Jonathan cringes at the fat-b!#$ specials, he remembers eating one once and thought he was going to have a coronary by the time he finished.

What the F!# happened?? is the first thought that goes threw Jonathan's head. He hadn't been this confused since he got J. Jonah Jameson's hate mail He turns in the oddly placed bed and sees another shock. One that makes him think, Oh S!#!

Jonathan never cared much about his neighbors or about the outside world much, not even the superhero battles and mutant politics that fills the media. He was always content to live his own little world, spending his days on the computer or playing games. The only thing he noticed was when the neighbor got a new and very strange girlfriend.

A woman of Japanese descent standing 165 cm (5ft 5) with bright green eyes, porcelain-white skin, and long, flowing ruby red hair. She was very thin and moved unnaturally as if flowing threw the air. He heard rumors that she was a mutant, but he never cared

Jonathan now looks at the sleeping form of Cassandra Yamaguchi.

Suddenly, his headache explodes into the mother of them all.

He was playing God of War II when the party got a little loud, so he gave up and went to the door to see how many idiots it took to make that much noise. The entire apartment was partying and they were all drinking and eating enough fat to choke a whale. He was about to go back inside, when he was grabbed by two of his drunken neighbors and pulled into one of the rooms. He had never drank before that night, but the two fools kept feeding him White Russians while he was tied to a chair for several hours.

The memory turns gray and fuzzy, but he remembers Cassandra untying him and bringing him to the bedroom and suddenly feeling as if he was on fire.

The memory cuts off and Jonothan can suddenly think clearly. The hang over is gone and so is the sleep clouding his mind. He also notices Cassandra is awake.

"It is good to see you awake Jonothan." she says with emotionless voice.

"What happened last night? I remember everything except for the bedroom."

"As many have guessed, I am a mutant. My power is chemical manipulation. I can consume any form of matter, understand it's composition down to a molecular level, and secrete any chemical from my body."

Jonothan doesn't say anything, no accusations and no physical attacks. Unlike the son called Friends of Humanity, he's not stupid enough to attack a mutant with unknown powers out of fear.

She runs her finger across the surface of the table next to me, leaving three trails of powder. He notices that her finger tips have turned gray and the little veins can be scene. She points at the first line.

"C13H18O2. Ibuprofen. Headache medicine."

She points to the second line.

"C8H10N4O2 .1,3,7-trimethylxanthine. Caffeine"

She points to the third line.

"C21H23NO5. Heroin"

Jonothan pales.

"My 'boyfriend' Kevin had enough connections to protect me and I was his portable drug lab. The party last night was Kevin's celebration of his new wealth. I used it as an opportunity to cleanse myself."

Cassandra points at him and he looks down at his changed body. Yesterday, he was pale overweight computer geek. Today, the fat is gone leaving a little muscle especially the legs.

"What the?"

Cassandra points at the bathroom. The bottom of shower is covered in yellow grease-like liquid

"Last night, when the others were playing with you, they told me to give you a kiss. That kiss allowed me to determine you possessed an inactive, but stable x-gene. My own x-gene was unstable, which left me in a drugged state that Kevin could manipulate with ease. When I took you to the bedroom, I absorbed the excess fat cells from your body and used them to stabilize my own body. Then I pushed the mind numbing chemicals and toxins from my body into the fat and expelled it."

She sucked out my fat and used it as sponge to wipe her body clean? Ewww.

'It also resulted in the activation of your genes. Welcome to Mutant-kind."

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**CLASSIFIED**

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_**"We just detected three new mutant signatures. Two just became fully activated and the power levels of other one has increased by a large amount, around 800 to 900 ."**_

_**"Send in the capture teams Alpha and Beta. We don't want Xavier, Misfits, or GRSO interfering."**_

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X-Mansion

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"We just detected three new mutant signatures." says Xavier as he in his hover chair float in. "The reading are stranger than usual, so I want this done quickly. Two are in a small apartment complex and the third is in Downtown Hospital."

Logan, Rina, Alex, and Hank stand in front of Xavier.

"Logan, I want you and Rina to contact the two mutants at the apartment complex." says Xavier giving Logan a print out, then turns to Beast, "Hank, I want you to go to the Hospital. Alex can go with you."

"What about the rest, Chuck?" asks Logan

"Peter and Paige are helping with Penny."

In another part of the mansion, the fully armored Colossus and a metal skin Husk are trying to get Penny out of a tree. Husk jumps back as bloody pieces of an idiot Squirrel fall from a branch. A total idiot to live in a tree near Penny, the Ultimate Hunter's Knife.

"Amara and Tabitha are upset with each other and Sam is trying to help them."

In another part of the mansion,. Boom-Boom is tossing explosive plasmoids at the Roma Nova Princess and Magma is frying fiery blasts at the klepto demolition apprentice. Cannonball charge in and gets between the two girls, only to be blasted unconscious by the feminine mutant power. Both girls stop fighting to see if the smoking former miner can dig his way out of the crater.

"Taylor and Jamie are on the Internet. Something about a personal project."

Taylor and Jamie at the computer. On the screen is a legal web page with the title "Current Sexual Harassment Laws and You." Suddenly, the screen turns white and pink. Three little animated mermaid icons appear on the screen and devour web page leaving a pink background. Taylor and Jamie's jaws drop as the words, "Nice try, Cuties." in white appear on the screen.

"Bobby..."

X-23 growls with enough menace to scare a pride of lions. Wolverine backs away from his clone/ daughter who almost glows.

In a less used part of the mansion, Iceman is hiding in a closet his scent hidden by old gym socks and vodka cleaner bottles. He wishes with his immortal soul, that he hadn't froze Rina's Tampons.

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Helicopter Alpha

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Inside a stealthy covert ops chopper, eight soldiers dressed in special gear prepare to capture two of the three target mutants.

While the pilots and a technician are dressed in normal gray and black military uniforms with black helmets, the eight are dressed in strange biomorphic armor. It seems to be composed of dark silver gray leather plates covering black cables and fibers. There are small silver half-orbs embedded in the forearms near the wrists, lower legs near the ankles, waist in the front, and the back of the hands. There heads are featureless except for a thin visor going nearly to the back of head.

"What is this freaky stuff and what is suppose to do?" asks Soldier 1

"It's a multi-environment powered exo-skeletal combat suit composed of layers of nano-weave polymers and synthetic muscle tissue covered by hybrid reactive armor plates composed of organic and inorganic material." answers Soldier 2, "It's controlled by nanocomputer system connected to the CNS."

"It's armor that boosts your strength." adds Soldier 3

"The suit allows you to withstand several direct hits of class 100 strength and can withstand extreme heat, cold, electrical surges, high pressure, and chemical attacks. It also boosts the strength 10 fold under normal conditions and strikes to Class 100 for a very short period. This will allow us to withstand and counter various mutant abilities."

"The armor protects you from mutant powers." adds Soldier 3

"What about weapons?" asks Soldier 1

"We each carry a tech-no-organic design particle-plasma rifle. It suspends particles inside plasmoid contained by a electromagnetic field then uses a combination rail and jet stream to propel the plasmoid to target. When the plasmoid connects with the target, the particles are released into the target. The effect is designed to counter mutagenic auras and render the subjects unconscious threw electrical surge to CNS."

"Anti-Mutant Shock Rifles"

"We each carry three hand-held anti-personnel weapons designed to be thrown and then explode after a short time and are used to confuse, disorient, or distract a potential threat."

"Expensive 'Flash and Bang' grenades."

"The suits have extremely tacky and tenacious materials carried in compressed form with a propellant and used to block, entangle, and impair individuals."

"Sticky Foam guns"

"Anything Lethal." adds Soldier 1 as Soldier 2 glares at Soldier 3, which is impressive with no face

"The T-O particle-plasma rifles were designed to effect organic targets. If they hit solid inorganic matter, especially conductive metal, they cause rapid heating and release of energy."

"Hit something, instead of someone. Boom!"

"We carry weapons designed to fire small thin darts either composed of adamentium with a molecular tip for penetration or barbed hard polymer loaded with a fast acting toxin."

"Needle-guns"

"The final weapon is a pair of extremely sharp armor blades that vibrate at extremely high frequency allowing them to cut threw most materials at close range bar invulnerable targets and materials like adamantium and vibranium. They are housed in the forearms and are triggered by wrist switches."

"Forearm Swords."

"Why no normal guns??" asks Soldier 1, while Soldier 2 looks like he wants to throw Soldier 3 out the doors.

"With the exception of adamentium lances, the entire suit is non-magnetic. The nano-built bio-armor is designed to be immune or resistant to electromagnetic fields, but the cost of mass producing it prevents it from be used in solid projectiles. "

"Too Expensive."

**WHAM!**

Soldier number 1 looks at the hole in chopper's side caused by Soldier 3's head.

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Knight Apartments

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"This is nuts."

"You sad that."

"I spend my days on computers and playing video games. I don't do sports or outdoor activities."

"Hence the layer of fat."

"I hate all forms of politics. I don't volunteer. I sure as hell don't get involved with mutant politics."

"First time for everything."

"I like being alone. I like my little life. I am or was content."

"Very Zen."

"Now, I've been mutated by a walking drug lab anorexic b!#$ and I also learned she's a murderer and melted her former boyfriend into a puddle of soapy goo"

"I'm not anorexic."

"...!"

"Well... I'm not."

Suddenly, there is a crashing sound as soldier is gray armor land on the apartment roofs.

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New York Downtown Hospital

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"Explain now!" says Michael X Brown as the doctor comes in.

"It appears your mutation was very unstable. It was forced to activate to save your life, but it put strain on your biology. It had to rebuild you from the genetic level up to survive the regeneration."

"How does that lead to a sex change??"

"The theory is during the transformation your damaged Y chromosome was destroyed and to survive it was recreated a copy of your X chromosome. Since your DNA now read female, it rebuilt your body according to the new genes. It rebuilt you cell by cell at it's highest quality, resulting in your hyper feminine beauty"

"S!#!"

Michael clenches his fist in angry and then notices the metal railing of the examination bed has twisted like putty. He opens his hand showing a detailed fingerprints in the stainless steel.

"Your primary mutant abilities appear to be immense superhuman strength and durability."

"Primary?" says Michael playing with a piece of steel like children's plasticine.

"Secondary powers support or are caused by primary powers. Mutants with fire abilities are immune to their own flames and without those secondary powers they would incinerate themselves. Wings alone won't allow a human to fly under normal physics, they need extra help.'

'You possess immense strength, but you also possess a tactile aura that allows you to tether yourself to the ground and surround objects. It allows you to lift heavy objects without sinking into the ground, lift large objects without causing them to crumble, and not go flying in the opposite direction due to Newton's Third Law if you send someone flying. You also possess the durability of heavy combat armor, but your skin is still soft, smooth, and flawless."

"How do you know this stuff? I mean this is normal hospital now Muir Island place."

"Knowledge is power. Those FOH fools are ignorant, so they lack power. The lack of power fills them with fear and fear leads to anger. When I learned of mutants, I decided to learn as much as possible. Dr. Moira Ann Kinross MacTaggert, who runs Muir Island, is one of main sources of information."

"What am I going to do now? None of my ID matches and I doubt my company will hire a mutant. The boss is a bigot and is facing his second sexual harassment lawsuit. I was so close to that promotion."

"Sir?"

"God! I have to learn about feminine hygiene. I'll be celebrate for the rest of my life. I never liked children to begin with and I'm not going threw the female half of reproduction. I can't handle normal brats, so no way could I handle super powered mutant brats."

"Mr. Brown?"

"I'm going to have to change my name. Michael. Michaela? Miguela? 'Who is like God?' More like Goddess. Not like I would dress as one. Maybe a Goddess or Angel name??"

**"MR. BROWN."**

The trans-gendered mutant girl stops her mad rant and turns to the pale doctor.

"I think we may have a problem" says the Doctor pointing out the window.

On the roof, a military helicopter lands on the hospital landing pad and soldiers in weird armor jump out.

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The Roof

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Eight men in armor jump out of the chopper, disconnect metal cables connected to there backs,

and run towards the stair access.

"Computer taps indicate the mutant is five floors down." says the Leader (Number 1) as they go down the stairs, "The trackers will be able to detect her at 50 meters."

"This will be easy." says the second soldier (number 2).

Suddenly, the steel door to indicated floor explodes off the hinges and smashes into number two. The leader who managed to jump clear, when his second made that stupid Murphy challenge, watches as number two goes over the railing.

A silver metal object speeds past the Leader's head and creates a small crater in the wall. It's followed by a second and third object. A fourth manages to tear threw the railing before hitting the wall. The Leader notices one of objects fall out of the broken concrete, a crushed bedpan!

"Sir, we found the mutant." says number three.

The Leader manages to give the soldier a look that says "No Kidding, Idiot.", which impressive in a faceless helmet. He gives a signal and three and four take positions on either side of the doorway with there rifles. The rifles are long and thin with smooth dark gray casings that make them look organic.

Three and Four turn into the door and open fire. The rifles fire blue shots propelled by glowing blue mist and they fly down the hall. Most of the shots hit the wall at the far end causing it to glow blue and crackle with electrical charge before exploding. One shot hits a empty gurney, which causes the sheet and thin mattress to ignite and the pillow to explode!

The Leader makes a gesture and Three and Four take point. They are followed by five and six with the Leader between them, then seven and eight in the rear. The formation protects the Leader and if the mutant attacks from any side they will face at least three guns.

N3 N4

N5 LN1 N6

N7 N8

The soldiers have to hurry due on the major weaknesses of armor they wear. The energy consumption of suits means they need an external charger. When umbilical power cable is disconnected, it only has 30 minute battery time. The power consumption increases six fold if they use boost mode, reducing a full charge to 5 minutes.

Miss Brown appears from around a corner and throw two water coolers at the soldiers. They reflectively shoot the bottles causing them to explode into a blinding steam cloud. In the confusion, Number Three accidentally shoots Number Four. The blue light disperses and ripples across the armor, but doesn't do any damage.

The Leader is thankful that the designers made the armor immune or resistant to there own weapons to prevents friendly fire situations.

Another set of large objects shoot into the mist and soldiers two and three activate there Forearm swords and slice the objects. Unfortunately, the objects are not plastic water cooler bottles, but large pressurized oxygen tanks. The blades slice threw the metal like hot knives threw soft butter, causing them to explode violently. The blast is powerful enough to crater the ground and send Three and Four flying into Five and Six. The Leader is caught by seven and eight. The high frequency forearm blades of numbers three and four are cracked and broken releasing the mysterious blue smoke of electronic death.

Number Three loses his temper and tosses his now broken rifle. He activates his Sticky Foam guns and charges into the room, despite the warning of the Leader. As the other soldiers pull themselves to there feet, except for the unconscious number three, there is a cry of surprise.

The group enters the room to find Number Three trapped inside pink bubblegum-like foam sandwiched between to gurneys. It looks like the mutant used one of the beds as a shield, then used it to smash the soldier into another bed. There's also a hole in the wall indicating where the mutant went.

Each soldier goes threw single file, but when Number Eight is about to go threw, Miss Brown jumps down from the ceiling and pushes the armored soldier threw the wall. The soldier can only think, Oh S!#, before he collides head first with the parking lot scaring a group of protesters enough to wet themselves.

The wall glows a faint blue then explodes outward nearly knocking the young mutant down. Four, Five, Six, and Seven appear from the smoke and open fire. The shots don't miss at point blank range.

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Knight Apartments

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On the second level of the apartment complex, Team Beta's eight members have arrived at the party apartment. B2 and B3 go to each side of the door with B4, B6, and B8 behind B2 and B3, B5, and B7 behind B3. It's a narrow walk way only allowing one-and-half people. A cut corner in the construction of the complex, in order to afford the large pool.

Beta Two kicks the door in and charges in with Beta Three, weapons ready and scanning the room. They see a frail form of Cassandra standing next to a window looking relaxed. She currently finishing off a large bottle. It's a huge plastic vodka container apparently filled with the party's remaining liqueur supply.

"FREEZE!"

Cassandra looks at them, then pulls out a cigarette and a lighter. The soldiers watch as the mutant girl ignores them and puts the cancer stick in her mouth, then opens the scratched Zeppo lighter.

"Where is the other mutant, woman!?." yells B3

Cassandra looks up at them as she turns the thumb wheel

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**KRA-THOOM!!**

The other armored soldiers watches as B2 and B3 are blown threw the door, shattering the frame in the process. They are carried by the massive red-orange fireball over the thin railing and into the swimming pool below. B4 and B5 jump in and open fire with the rifles on full auto

The shower of glowing blue shots hits the back wall and furniture causing them to explode into flames. One glowing shot bounces off a bottle and hits the toilet causing the water inside to superheat and causing the whole porcelain throne to explode.

The soldiers scan the room and see the window is blown out.

"Damn It!" yells Leader, using his soldier's video feed, "B4 and B5 follow Target 1. B6 and B7 secure and search for Target 2. I'm running a tighter scan."

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Jonathan Jordan Jones watches as two men in sci-fi armor jump out the broken window. When they saw the soldiers arrive, Cassandra told him to hide so he ducked in the closet.

He can only guess how Cassandra create the fireball that blasted the first two soldiers. His mind flashes back to science classes and guesses she converted the water in liquor into gaseous hydrogen and oxygen and that combined and compressed with ethanol and various hydrocarbons created enough force.

Why am I thinking about science class? thinks JJ Jones, It's as stupid as remembering what I ate June 3, 1987! Suddenly, images flash threw his mind and recalls. Peanut butter on toast in the morning. Chocolate bar and sandwich at lunch. Kraft Dinner after school.

"Woah. That was weird." he whispers to himself.

He recalls how the soldiers attacked and how there weapons effected objects in the room. He also notices the rifle of one of the soldiers blasted outside landed near the closet. He slowly slides out of the closet moving with a feline grace he has never possessed before and grabs the gun.

"Freeze mutant." says B6 with B7 next to him.

"You shouldn't take what isn't yours, boy." says B7, "Drop the gun."

"You should build your guns with fingerprint scanners." says JJ before he leaps out of the closet.

The soldiers fire at the mutant, but he slides across the alcohol and grease stained floor, holding the gun. There shots blow small holes in the floor causing the room to shake. As he hits the wall, he swings himself around and fires the futuristic weapon at the feet of the soldiers. The shots that hit there legs cause no damage, but the shots that hit the floor cause massive damage.

There is a pause with the B6 and B7 stand surrounded by a circle of burning, splintered wood and shattered plaster. Then both soldiers fall threw the floor.

JJ slowly stands up as the trash-filled alcohol-soaked apartment begins to burn.

"I need to get my stuff out of this death trap!"

"You won't need your stuff."

JJ turns to see the Leader, Beta-One. He's not holding his shock rifle, instead his Needle-guns are armed. JJ watches as the guns fire and long thin needle-like darts shoot from the tiny barrels.

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Near the Apartments

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B4 and B5 chase the fast moving form of Cassandra and as she slips on discharged garbage, they manage to hit her with a couple of stun shots. She quickly falls and loses consciousness.

"We got the little B!#$!" says B4, "Let's get her back to the chopper."

"Maybe we can rough her up a little for what she did to two and three."

"No time. We only have small batteries."

"and small brains."

B4 turns and his arm is grabbed by a hairy left arm and pulled. His armored form is pulled into a punch to the stomach, then lifts him off the ground. B4 can also feel three blades impale him as he looks into two dark eyes.

B5 turns only to receive a powerful kick to the face, a second kick that knocks his weapon away, and a third kick across the throat. A blade extending from her foot and powerful leg muscles easily cut threw the thin armor of the neck.

Wolverine and X23 lets the two armor soldiers fall to the ground as crimson and black mech liquid forms a pool underneath them.

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Hospital

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The rifles of Four, Five, Six, and Seven fire shot after shot at Miss Brown.

The shots shred and burn the bandages and hospital gown from her body, leaving her nearly nude before the soldiers. That shots destroy clothing, metal, and construction materials with ease, but not Miss Brown's superhumanly durable flesh. The shots hit her tan skin and shatter, dispersing across her form and into the air, leaving nothing but a static charge.

Alpha Four and Five switch to there Needle-guns and try to turn the mutant beauty into a pin cushion. The best piercing and cutting weapons are composed of adamantium, the near indestructible iron alloy first created by metallurgist Dr. Myron McClain Tools and weapons composed of this metal are indestructible except to special machines and magic. The problem with most of these items is not the item itself, but the power exerted on it. The sharp adamantium needles, even propelled at many times the speed of sound still don't possess the kinetic energy to pierce her skin.

The metal needles falls to the ground like a fallen sewing kit.

Alpha Six and Seven use there 'Flash and Bang' grenades to blind her long enough for them to get close with there forearm blades. As the high frequency blade hits her body, there is a loud screeching sound and the blades explode into tiny metal pieces. The tiny shrapnel pierces there armor in several places causing black ooze to spray out.

"Damn it! My systems are breached." yells Alpha Six.

"I'm losing mobility" adds Number Seven.

"and now losing consciousness." adds Miss Brown before hitting the two soldiers to send them flying over the heads of Four, Five, and the Leader. There heads hit the wall hard enough to create craters and as they slide down they also tear trenches in the plaster.

Miss Brown decides it's time to move and runs out the broken door. The Leader manages to chase her, but Four and Five encounters problems. Alpha Four's problem is covered in thick blue fur with fangs, and claws and Alpha Five's Problem is a pissed off blonde surfer from Hawaii.

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Miss Brown stands in the middle of hall facing the Leader. She isn't even care that she's a few burnt ribbons short of being completely naked.

The Leader clenches his fists then moves his wrist hand to his left wrist. He slides open a hidden panel on the underside of the left arm near the wrist. It reveals a large red button, which can be clearly scene against the grey and black armor.

"So what's that? Another stupid weapon?" mocks Miss Brown.

The red button begins to blink.

"You shouldn't be so confident, girl."

"Why not? I was never a fighter and I'm still new to my powers, yet I'm wiping the floor with your soldiers."

The red button fully lights up.

"This is why."

The Leader presses the glowing button and loud humming as his suit powers up.As red button glows brightly, electrical energy crackles across the dark silver gray armor. The suit expands slightly as if the person inside just gained height and muscle mass, and an aura of energy seems to flow around it. Slowly the armor plates change from silver-gray to glowing gold and jets of steam shoot from the glowing orbs.

"The designers were Anime fan boys?" asks Miss Brown.

"No time to talk, only time to die."

The Leader blurs and his fist collides with Miss Brown's face. The impact is so powerful it creates a visible shock wave that cracks the floor. The young mutant is sent flying down the hall and threw the wall at the end. She manages to grab the edge to prevent herself from falling off the building. As she pulls herself up, she finds the Leader in front of her again. He grabs her and runs down the hall, grinding her head against the wall tearing a trench.

Near the starting point, the Leader jumps up and swings Miss Brown down into the floor hard enough to create another crater. He then stomps on her head, smashing her threw the floor to the level below. He jumps after her to finish the job.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Knight Apartments

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jonathan Jordan Jones turns to see the Leader, Beta-One. He's not holding his shock rifle, instead his Needle-guns are armed. JJ watches as the guns fire and long thin needle-like darts shoot from the tiny barrels. He watches as pair of needles move towards him releasing rippling distortion s in the air.

It's like slow motion and Jonathan reacts moving out of way as the needles fly by. He continues to move out of the way of the slow moving needles, bending his new lean form with the ease of a Chinese child contortionist. The Leader on the other hand sees JJ blur, moving so fast it leaves after images

Suddenly, JJ grabs a couple of the needles and tosses them back at his speed. The Leader is knocked back by the supersonic.needles hitting him in the faceplate. The sharp needles manage to pierce the armor, going less than an centimeter into the Leader's face, but enough to cause immense pain.

The Leader thrashes in pain and turns at a war cry to see JJ swinging a heavy ice bucket, that hits the bottom of the needle darts and drives them deeper like a large hammer hitting sharp nails. The needles go completely threw the Leader's head and embedded themselves into in the back armor of the helmet.

JJ drops the now damaged bucket as the Leader drops to the floor, Dead.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hospital

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dr. Henry McCoy, known as blue furry mutant Beast, is fighting Alpha Four. Alpha four tries to swing around to fire his rifle, but Beast grabs and uses it and throws the soldier into a wall. Alpha Four fires his needle guns, but Hank jumps up and grabs the ceiling, avoiding the needles, then jumps down ramming his feet into Alpha Four's face. Alpha Four charges with his forearm blades screaming like a maniac.

Alex Summers, Havok, is causing Havok to Alpha Five. Alpha Five tried to use his stun rifle, only to have a kinetic blast from Havok blow it to bits. He fired his Sticky Foam gun, only for Alex to shoot the spray in midair making the examination room look like the bottom of a movie theater chair. The needle gun also fails, with the needles blow out of the air and then the guns shattered in there housings. Alpha Five activates his boost power increasing his strength to Class 100 and goes in close for hand to hand.

Beast flips and grabs Alpha Four's wrists and flips him over. A the armored soldier rises, Beast grabs a scalpel, jumps over him, and lands behind the stunned swordsman. Alpha Four swings around with his forearm blade only to be grabbed by the wrist by one of Beast's large hands, the second hand holding the scalpel slashes threw the elbow joint. The armored goon can only watch as black fluid sprays and his suit loses all mobility and power.

Alex blasts the floor reducing it to powder. A blast to the chest and the powder reducing traction causing the Alpha Five to slip onto his back like a giant turtle, his immense super-strength made useless. Alex jumps on top of Alpha Five's chest and uses his powers to propel him like a surfer and a surf board. As they are about to go out the hole in the wall, Alex jumps off while blasting Alpha Five. The soldier goes out the hole and falls to ground below hard enough to create a crater.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alpha Leader jumps after Miss Brown to finish the job, only to receive a powerful upper cut that sends him flying back up the hole and into the ceiling to the knee caps. Miss Brown jumps up threw the hole and grabs the Leader's legs, pulling him free and then swinging him threw another wall and throwing him threw yet another.

The Leader hits another switch and the golden aura of his armor glows brightly as the safeties are disengaged. As he tightens his right wrist,. white flame-like energy boils across it's surface..

Miss Brown takes a stance and tightens her own fists with the audible popping sound.

There is a pause, then the two charge at each other trying to kill each other with a single blow./

A twist of fate as both fists collide between them. The impact of the superhuman mutant and the boosted armored soldier creates a shock-wave powerful enough to shatter the remaining lights and windows, and creates a crater around them. The two forces press against each other, the Leader trying to turn mutant bone to dust and mutant flesh to pulp and Miss Brown trying to shatter the armored shell.

Suddenly, Miss Brown's fist breaks threw the golden aura and the Leader's fist caves in. Inside the gauntlet, bones are fragmented into dust in an instant. The alloy breaks and cracks the entire length of the arm, black fluid explode and spray from the ruined hand and joints, an arcs of electrical power crawl across the soldier's screaming form. The golden aura evaporates leaving gray alloy with the ruined arm glowing red and arcing energy.

Miss Brown steps back as the entire arm explodes and the Leader loses consciousness.

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X-Mansion

1 week later

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Misfits teleport in to annoy the X-Men. They have been busy for the past week with three major assignments.

The first was another plot by Cobra involving stealing two tanker trucks, each containing half of a experimental binary explosive that the military was developing. A mishap caused one tank to end up in an mining town filled by bigots and run by a crazy Purist-style priest. The other was successfully stolen by Cobra and later hidden in a mine above the town. After several mishaps including twenty gallons of paint and an inflatable sex doll, the two chemicals were accidentally combined inside the mine and detonated

Even with the loss of the shipment, it was still considered a victory since the Priest had been thrown out of town, Cobra had flambes, and the town's people no longer hate mutants. The last may be due to the veins of precious metals that were uncovered in the old mine by the blast.

The second mission was a terrorist plot by the Friend of Humanity. They managed to get there hands on the nerve agent VX stolen from Newport Chemical Depot in Indiana. They planned to use well-known chemical weapon against Mutant Town's populace, not understanding that the range would wipe out most of New York.

In the end, the canisters were switched with canisters US Government Standard Bathroom Malodor, a vile mixture of eight chemicals with stench resembling human feces, only much stronger, designed to test the efficacy of deodorizers and air fresheners.The mutant populace followed the smell thinking it was a broken sewer and found the FOH in gas masks. Much violence occurred.

The last mission was the longest and most difficult, after one extremely bad drunken scandal, the Misfits had to hide the alcohol from the most alcoholic Joes. It took many long hours and many meters of cable and hand cuffs. They also had to find a place to store enough booze to fill six swimming pools.

That mission ended in a near success. Never underestimate Shipwreck, when there's alcohol involved.

"Hello!" yells Quicksilver, "We have returned!"

Scarlet Witch whips him with a broken extension cord causing him to jump over a chair.

"Why do you keep doing that!?"

"It's works on the bravest of animals, maybe it will work on cowards too."

Nicholas notices the mess in the living room and follows it into the kitchen and finds X-23 drinking a couple of coffee. He had meet the X-Men, a week ago in the prank-the-X-men tradition of the Misfits. X-23 and Logan were the only ones he didn't prank.

"Hey, Rina." he whispers, thinking she may have a headache and doesn't want to end up mutant kabob, "What happened to this place?"

"New recruits." says Rina, "My healing factor normally prevents headaches, except from Misfits."

"Tell me about them."

"Miss Michael X Brown and Mr. Jonathan Jordan Jones." says Rina, "They both activated on the same day, but because of different reasons. Michael was in the hospital after a bombing, while JJ slept with a mutant chemical weapons factory."

"Yikes! What happened to Miss Mass Destruction??"

"SHIELD adopted her. She killed her abusive boyfriend and we don't want another Autumn." says Rina taking a sip, "Most of the damage was caused by Michael."

"I guess Super strength. Wait a minute, Miss Michael?"

**"I'M A GUY, DAMMIT!"**

Pietro goes flying threw a wall and lands upside down next to the fridge.

"She was male until the X-gene hermamorphed him." says Hank walking in with a bruised eye. "Amara and Tabitha tried to get her to wear 'gender-appropriate clothing' and she refused. When they later tried to force the issue, much damage occurred."

"JJ is hiding from Logan." says Rina, "He refuses to have Danger Room sessions."

"He has computer-like mind which also grants superhuman reflexes and minor cyberpathic and telepathic abilities." explains Hank, "He lacks any physical or offensive abilities like Doug did. So he finds the idea of fighting robots and giant saw blades, unthinkable."

"He's also very lazy."

"Miss Brown doesn't like the Danger Room either." adds Tabitha, "She's strong and tough enough to beat Colossus and reduce those bots to scrap, but she... he spends most of his time reading and researching."

Althea walks in to find an unconscious Quicksilver and Nicholas talking with the X-Men.

"What up with the gender-confused bruiser girl?"

"I think we have a couple of new recruits" says Nicholas.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: So completes my Power Trio. The Crossovers begin after this.


	4. Smoking Hot!

--

**AEON MISFITS**

--

A X-Men Evo Misfits crossover by Spaceman

newfiespaceman yahoo.ca

www dot fanfiction dot net slash spaceman

Written:

February 29, 2008 March 01, 2008 March 04, 2008 March 05, 2008

April 21, 2008

Edited

April 21, 2008

--

**DISCLAIMER**

X-Men Evolution is the property of Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, Marvel, and Co.

GI Joe is the property of Hasbro, Marvel, and other companies.

Misfits is the property of Red Witch. Permission Given.

Original chars belong to me.

This is a work of fan fiction for non-profit entertainment purposes only.

No profit or offense intended.

--

Author's Notes

**KEY**

Sound **LOUD SOUND**

_telepathy mental command_

#phone# Computer Screen

(1) Warning 1st chapter is wordy, a lot of intros. For those who haven't read Red Witch

(2) Most OC names come from "most popular names" and "most common surnames" lists.

(3) Foreign languages come from Internet Translator.

This is an experiment with action instead of comedy.

--

**EPISODE 04:Smoking Hot!**

--

**Hawk's Office**

--

Hawk swallows a few Metahuman-Strength Headache Medicine and the starts his report.

On the desk next to him is the latest group photo of the Misfits the source of the headache.

It's been four months since Nicholas Dark, Michael X Brown, and Jonathan J. Jones joined the Misfits. In that time, they have joined the other Misfits on one hundred and eight missions ranging from small jobs to large scale attacks. They have becomes typical Misfits.

Next is the profiles.

_--_

_Name: Dark, Nicholas_

_Primary Power(s): Regenerative Healing Factor_

_Description: An accelerated healing process that enables him to regenerate damaged or destroyed tissue with far greater efficiency than an ordinary human. _

_Secondary Power(s):_

_Foreign Chemical Immunity; Immunity to Disease, Insulated Weather Adaptation; Retarded Aging; Superhuman Strength, Stamina, Reflexes, and Agility; Superhumanly Acute Senses_

_Notes:_

_Nicholas is an amnesiac mutant found floating in the waters off Eastern Canada, with ID indicating he was a student of Genesis Academy. The Academy was missing before Joe forces could investigate. He was a very calm demeanor, which allows him to survive the usual Misfit insanity. He's also acts as control, preventing the more active Misfits from causing too much trouble to allies._

_--_

"He's to us, like X23 and Wolverine are to the X-Men." says Hawk to himself, "He's also good at sniffing out Shipwreck's booze, finding out which of the new green boys are high, and determining which female Joes are on there periods so the males known to avoid them"

He shudders at what happened to one new recruit, who bothered Jinx last week. One thought going threw his mind, How can a three prong sai fit up there?

_--_

_Name: Brown, Michael X._

_Primary Power(s): Physical Augmentation._

_Description: The subject's body has far greater mass and muscle density_

_Secondary Power(s):_

_Superhuman Strength (Class 100) and Durability, Enhanced Enhanced Stamina and Agility; Superhuman Reflexes; Healing Factor (minor)._

_Notes:_

_Michael was a compulsive workaholic on his way a business meeting when he was caught in a terrorist bombing. His mutant ability awoke and reacted to save his life, in the process granting superhuman physical abilities. It also resulted in a gender transformation that has given him gender issues,.temper problems and a cynical outlook on life_

_--_

Hawk remembers the first week after Miss Brown and Mr. Jones left the X-Mansion. He watched the beautiful amazon tear apart old tanks, rending thick plates of enhanced steel like aluminum foil.

He also cringes at the memory of the drunk Green-shirt who made a pass and grabbed her ass. A double "Inguinal orchiectomy" with out anesthetic. The fool also needed reconstructive surgery to repair the damage to his pelvis and colon.

_--_

_Name: Jones, Jonathan J._

_Primary Power(s): Kinetic Memory_

_Description: The subject's mind works in the same way as a computer with unlimited storage capacity, only much faster. He is able to perform several mental functions at once without losing focus on any of them. Also, allows him to instantly recall specific information with incredible speed and accuracy. _

_Secondary Power(s):_

_Multi-Tasking; Superhuman Reflexes and Agility; Cyberpathy; Telepathy (minor)_

_Notes:_

_Jonathan was a slacker and loner before his mutant gene activation. He spent most of his time on the computer, watching television and movies, reading comic books, and writing fan fiction. His mutant ability was not activated normally, but by having a encounter with a female mutant. The mutant girl used him to purge toxins from her body, but managed to awake his impressive mental abilities._

_--_

Hawk is impressed by the Multi-Tasking, but not it's used. He saw him connect to a set of wireless computers and allocating a partition of his brain to searching for fanfic, another part for downloading music, a part for downloading movies, a part for playing an Online Game, and using the remainder to write a fanfiction. He's now a multi-tasking Slacker.

"OK. Now for the missions. It's been a busy four months. An average of 27 missions per month."

Hawk writes for several minutes, the stops at a certain mission

_Mission 024/108 - Burning Air Formula_

_Assigned Team:_

_Main: Wavedancer, Toad, Avalanche, Blob, Scarlet Witch, and Quicksilver_

_Addition: Pyro, Arcade, Nicholas, JJ, and Miss Brown_

_Summary: Recovery of stolen chemical weapon formula._

"Brazilian chemist Dr. Silva created a new lachrymatory agent, a chemical compound that irritates the eyes to cause tears, pain, and even temporary blindness. The formula was to become military grade pepper spray, but after a failed kidnapping the formula and samples were stolen by drug dealers mistaken for designer drugs. They case was sent north to Mexico and from there to Texas.'

'After one of dealers was revealed to be a powerful fire manipulating mutant, the DEA and other authorities asked GI Joe for assistance "

_**--**_

_**Flashback**_

_**--**_

"The gas formula is incomplete and inert unless it is mixed and heated with a liquid containing methyl vanillyl nonenamide." says the formula creator Dr. Silva over the radios.

"Capsaicin!" says Nicholas, "Your saying if this formula is mixed with spicy food..."

"It will produce a chemical gas designed to incapacitate large crowds, but at extremely toxic levels."

"How hot? Scoville scale." asks Nicholas

"Give me a second to calculate.." says the scientist with the sound of computer typing, "Above 5000."

"We have a big problem." says Nicholas

In front of him is a huge area with many tens and under each tent is a person next to a huge pot and bowls to serve customers. There are also smaller bowls of chips, Pinto beans, and other foods. There are bottles that read Blair's 16 Million Reserve and The Source, from Original Juan Specialty Foods and jars marked Dorset Naga Pepper, Red Savina habanero, and other peppers.

The banner above reads **"US Grand Chili Cook Off and Hot Sauce Lover's Convention 2008"**

--

"Fortunately, the Misfits managed to find the dealers before they could escape the Convention and managed to apprehend the subjects."

--

The three drug dealer are dark skinned Latin Americans with thick black hair and dark eyes. The two normal human dealers have mustaches and muscular builds. The Brazilian mutant is clean shaved with a thin build. All of them wear red shirts, black pants, and black shoes, but the mutant wears a red and black pattern headband.

The mutant boy known as Rei de Vulcão (Volcano King) is fighting Pyro. The Latin American has the pyrokinetic ability to superheat ambient inorganic compounds causing them to "erupt" into explosion of flame. He's currently using his power to superheat the Silica in the sand beneath Pyro. The Australian mutant on the other hand is using his pyrokinetic abilities to shape the flame into cowboys and horses made of the fire.

--

The other two men have pulled out there choice of weapons, they each have a pair of Taurus PT92 pistols, license-built reproductions of Beretta 92s used by the Brazilian Army. They are expert shots with the semi-automatic pistols and they have a large supply of hollow point 9 mm Parabellum rounds

Wavedancer's solution is to using her mutant ability to manipulate the water to create balls of chili then rams it into the drug traffickers, knocking them down with the help of an invisible Xi. Quicksilver whips by stealing the guns and there wallets, Toad kicks them into the air, then Avalanche creates a wave of Earth that flings the duo into a stall. They collapse, dizzy, confused and in serious pain into the chairs.

JJ pops up from behind the counter and places two glasses in front of the two dealers like a bar man. The glasses aren't filled with liqueur, but a dark liquid.

"Which ordered The Source?"

"O que você disse??" (What did you say??) says the one on the left speaking Portuguese

JJ then throws the contents of both glasses into the eyes of the two criminals. The liquid was a pepper extract used to make large amounts of food hotter with a single drop. The Scoville scale is a measure of the 'hotness' of a chili pepper or anything derived from chili peppers, i.e. hot sauce. Cayenne pepper has a rating between thirty thousand and fifty thousand. Common Pepper spray found in women's hand bags rate two million and Police grade Pepper spray rates five point three million. The Source, from Original Juan Specialty Foods rates over Seven Million!

"Os meus Olhos! Os meus Olhos! Alguém os recortou!!"

(My Eyes! My Eyes! Someone cut them out!!)

"Eles queimam-se! Queime-se! A Dor!"

('They burn! Burn! The Pain!')

--

Pyro's Cowboys merge together into one giant western hero who ropes Rei de Vulcão. The giant fire cowboy swings the Latin mutant around above his head forming a ring of fire. Then with a crack, Rei is sent flying across the Convention area like a meteor creating a crater in the parking lot.

Pyro then collapses from the drain.

--

"That would have been the end of mission with a small repair to the parking lot and the hundred dollars for the Chief's Collector's Favorite, but one problem appeared. A problem named Kitty Pryde, whose vacation trip landed at the cook off. After that day, she was banned from cooking in the State of Texas."

--

**ROAAARRRR!!**

The source of the thunderous sound is an immense serpentine monster with a dark red body covered in dark red brown scales. The head of the creature is bulbous with a mouth of red and black tendrils, which makes the creature resemble something out of Lovecraft novel. As it attacks and devours stand after stand, it fires a pepper spray-like liquid at the same volume and pressure of an industrial fire house. The chemical jet is powerful enough to shatter wood, tear fabric, and cut human flesh.

"What are the odds that Kitty would create a chili creature while experimenting with foreign spices?"

"What are chance that it would eat the Burning Air Formula hidden near Kitty's stand causing it to grow from a one meter (3ft 4) worm into a thirty meter (98ft5) serpent?"

"What are our chances of stopping it?"

"I've been watching it devouring different 'Secret ingredients' used in the Chili con carne. Chocolate, cocoa, cumin, peanut butter, corn, pineapple, banana, oranges, tomatillos, beer, coffee, tequila, cola, honey, cinnamon, saffron, molasses, vinegar, red wine, whiskey, and bourbon. Ir's growth has been slowed by Chocolate, cocoa, coffee, and cola and increased by the tequila, red wine, whiskey, and bourbon. "

"The point!"

"Alcohol makes it grow faster, but Caffeine can kill it!"

"Where would we get that much Caffeine!?"

JJ pulls out a thermos of BA's Coffee.

"Where did you get that!? Didn't the Joes ban you from the mess hall to keep you away from it!?"

"So I overloaded the New York Stock Exchange." says JJ remembering interfacing with a million computers, "It was my first cup of coffee!"

"Blob! Fastball Special!"

The Fastball Special was created by Wolverine, a combination done by him and Colossus in which the metal Russian throws the Canadian berserker like a baseball. It's used to attack extremely tall targets, such as Sentinels. The technique was learned by his clone/daughter X-23/Rina. She later told Nicholas of the move, which he uses with Blob.

He may lack the razor-sharp adamentium claws of the two other feral mutants, but a thermos of BA's coffee can be just as lethal and the Jugglers are currently debating about listing it as a weapon.

Nicholas grabs hold of the monster's head and holds tight as the creature thrashes. As the creature kneels forward, he flips off tossing hot thermos directly down the throat. The canister tumbles down the throat, lands in the chemical stomach, and explodes into a green-brown cloud..

Nicholas is caught by Blob as the monster screams in pain.

The mutants and humans watch as the creature shakes as if having a seizure. It's brown scales crumble apart and the red flesh swells and blisters, pulsating as the creature moves. It's body stretches to it's limits and deforms into one large mass. Then the entire creature bursts into a red-brown chili cloud that soaks everyone.

Avalanche coughs and swallows some of the goo that got in his mouth.

"Congrats Kitty." says Lance to the stunned, chili covered Pryde, " You actually made something edible."

"I'm more surprised at that, then the defying physics.": says Scarlet Witch.

--

_**Flashback End**_

--

**ROAAARRRR!!**

General Hawk slowly gets up and moves towards the door. He looks outside to see a bunch of green shirts being chased by two foot mini versions of the Chili monsters

"I told them not to keep the leftovers."

--

**End of Chapter 04**

--

Sorry about the delay between chapters.

I have been busy with my "Halloween World" btvs mass crossover stories and I will be working on them for the next three months. I hope my fellow Misfit fans update there own stories soon.


	5. Sequel: Hallow Misfits

**NEW STORY: HALLOW MISFITS**

**AEON MISFITS **continues in the New Story **HALLOW MISFITS**

This New story arc combines my continuation of Redwitch's fantastic **Misfit **series - a crossover of GI Joe and X:men Evolution - with my own **Halloween World** series to create a multi-crossover.

**Misfits: **After Toad is abandoned to die in a swamp by Magneto, he rescued by GI Joe and is adopted by Roadblock. This sets in motion a chain of events, both comical and tragic, that turns Magneto's Brotherhood into chaos-causing Misfits.

My own additions include X-23 and Penance on a cooking show, Penance saving another world from demon-possessed Squirrel Girl, and my own collection of Misfits added to the main group.

**Halloween World:** In Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Ethan Rayne cast a spell that transformed a town into there costumes. In Halloween World, the spell didn't change a town for a night, but changed a world forever. Halloween World is a world of apocalyptic eternal night filled with demons, martial artists, ninja, shinigami, youkai, mage, and summoners. A world of near infinite crossovers.

Now, two people of Halloween World have traveled to the Misfit universe to help a friend from yet another world avenge her father and prevents the plans of criminals armed with advance technology. The problem is Halloween World has left a mark on them and now it's beginning to mark the world.

**WARNING**

This is story is slightly more serious than Aeon and contains Character Death (mostly the Bad Guys)

**First Chapter will be Posted August 23, 2008**


End file.
